623: Yes in Dee Dee, It's Dawn!
Dodgy Synopsis
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629: Kaimaku! Pokémon Kontesuto, Asatsuki Taikai!
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Today finds the twerps in... Daybreak Town! And the Contest is tomorrow! Awesome, it's always great when they cut out the filler. Dawn is excited, strutting with her Pokémon, Ash and Brock down the road towards to the Pokémon Centre talking about getting in some more practise to be ready to win her 5th Ribbon. Ash comments that she needs to perfect her Flame Ice Move, and Brock points out she shouldn't just rely on one move. Dawn remains confident though... till they turn a corner and see a familiar small girl standing with her back turned to them training a small Plusle and Minun that are dancing in unison. Suddenly Dawn falls to her butt and clutches her head, kicking her legs up and down (but being careful not to let anybody peek up between her thighs - her Momma would be proud!) and muttering no no no no no! What's the matter with her? Or is this just her way of dealing with stress? That must be it....
The others ask what the problem is and the female trainer turns around to see what the noise is - it's Ursula! She walks up and asks how many ribbons Dawn has, and it turns out that they both have 4 ribbons now and Ursula sneers sarcastically that she wonders who will win their 5th Ribbon first. Dawn insists she is ready and eager to compete and poses with Cyndaquil, Mamoswine and the proud little Piplup until Ursula smugly shows off her Plusle and Minun and Dawn cuts into another spaz attack, dropping to the ground again and clutching her head.
Ash asks what the problem is and Brock notes that they're cute, insisting that Dawn fall into line with Nintendo Animation Concern's desire to capture lightning in a bottle with continued merchandising potential based on the Pikachu brand.
But Dawn continues freaking out, Ursula grumpily telling her that she'd offending the two soulless little Pikachu clones, which haughtily draw themselves up with squeaky indignation. Dawn tries to get ahold of herself and calm down, until Ursula insists on making Dawn watch their dance of happiness and joy which fills Dawn with anything but.
The two little Pokémon dance beside her sparking with electricity, and Dawn's hair suddenly poofs up out from under her beanie and sparkles "like a diamond" according to Brock. Upon hearing the words, Dawn does as all women must when presented with diamonds and drops onto her back and lifts her ass up in the air, eyes closed to tolerate what must follow.
Ash, Brock and Piplup freak out, while Ursula remains confused... and Team Rocket are delighted in the bushes, watching as Dawn freaks out. Meowth recognises Ursula and, hilariously, Wobbuffet quietly and happily gasps out agreement/acknowledgment of the memory as Meowth sits on his head peeking. Jesse is delighted by the continuing competition between Dawn and Ursula because it leaves Jesse free to win another ribbon, and so they agree to retain their focus on the Contest itself and leave the twerps to fuck up their own chances.
Inside the Pokémon Centre, Dawn wakes up with a start and quickly checks her hair, brushing it down as Ash hands her a mug of hot milk. She gulps it down and thanks Ash for his surprising thoughtfulness and he happily and stupidly admits it was all Brock's idea to calm her down. They ask her to explain why she freaked out at the sight of Plusle and Minun and Brock figures it must be something in her past. Ash figures it out immediately, she MUST have been trying to catch them and failed!
Brock continues playing the Mr. Sensitive card and tells her she doesn't need to tell them if she doesn't want to, but she says she always meant to tell them one day and takes them in a flashback to the before time in the long long ago back when she was in kindergarten.
Her, Kenny and Leona were given the job of Pokémon Caretakers; they had to look after the Plusle and Minun that lived at the Kindergarten for the kids to play with. But one day while Kenny was preparing their food and Leona was cleaning the window of their enclosure, Dawn was chasing them around trying to play with them, insisting that it was in order to keep them out of Kenny and Leona's way. Grabbing them up and squeezing them with childish delight, she caused the two grumpy Pokémon to explode out a burst of sparks that popped Dawn's hair and lift it sparkling.
Kenny declared it looked like she had diamonds in her hair, while Leona quipped it was more like dandruff, so they decided to call her Diamond Dandruff - or Dee Dee for short. Dawn seemed to take it in surprising good humour, telling them there was "No need to worry." But when she returned to class to listen to storytime, she was humiliated by the other kids calling her Diamond Dandruff Dee Dee, and squeaking out in little girl fashion,"But I don't want diamond dandruff!"
Back in the present, Dawn explains she could never understand why the two little Pokémon she loved with all her tiny little girl heart would do something so mean to her. But as she stares down at her hot milk, she hears a huffling and chortling and looks up to discover Ash and Brock (and even Piplup!) are desperately trying to hold in their laughter while poor Pikachu is left trying to play peacemaker.
Brock finally gets hold of himself and tells her that Pokémon wouldn't attack unless they were provoked (or Beedrill, or Beedrill wearing a horny Ursaring outfit) and even dumb old Ash has figured out that she was attacked because she had been chasing them and the Pokémon were scared and upset - it was HER fault. Dawn sits back stunned and declares that this never occurred to her....
....and they both tell her that now she can put it behind her and face down her fears at the Contest the next day when she beats Ursula and her Plusle and Minun.
The trouble is... Ursula has been eavesdropping from a distance and caught the whole story, and now she knows Dawn's one weakness!
The next day, Marian welcomes everyone to the Daybreak Town Contest. The twerps are up in the crowd, as are James, Meowth and Wobbuffet - James actually straight up openly wearing his Team Rocket outfit like it ain't nuffin but a thang. Watching around the region are all the women in Dawn's life - her mother, her lesbian rival Zoey and her life-partner Candice, all watching to see if Dawn can gain her Fifth Ribbon and entrance into the Grand Festival.
The Judges are introduced - Mr. Contesta, Mr. Sukizo and..... Nurse Joy making up the numbers as per usual. Marian introduces herself last "humbly", while backstage Dawn prepares herself for her first Double Performance in awhile, telling Piplup that they're going to win this thing. She returns it to its Pokeball in preparation, and then Plusle and Minun latch onto her shoulders out of nowhere, causing her to panic and flail her arms about, knocking them loose. She drops to her knees in a mess and Ursula towers above her (as much as a little girl standing roughly 4 foot tall can), and calls her Miss Dee Dee. Dawn snaps back that her name is Dawn... then realises what she called her and demands to know how she knew that name. Ursula replies that she was wondering if Dawn might put some sparkles in her hair, and as Dawn snaps back, a delighted Jesse watches the two she considers her real competition screwing it up for themselves.
Marian introduces the first Coordinator and that's Jesse's cue to rush in followed by Carnivine. Marian is a little taken aback and reminds Jesse this is a DOUBLE performance, but Jesse tells her to have some patience and whips out a purple rod, puts it in her mouth and makes some beautiful music!
Playing the flute, Carnivine opens its mouth to reveal a Pokeball which then pops open and.... Seviper emerges in a flash from out of Carnivine's mouth like some kind of bizarre reverse fellation, all while the crowd watches enthralled. Marian unnecessarily narrates and explains the move as the crowd cheers and even the twerps are impressed by Jesselina adopting a NEW style once more. Carnivine and Seviper wriggle about in a coordinated shimmer, and then Seviper twists itself into a circle and spins into the air as Carnivine blasts Bullet Seed at it, creating a spinning circle of light. Carnivine then leaps high as Seviper drops back down, wrapping itself around Jesse's body (chance, thing, fine, gentle, eh, dodgers?) as Carnivine shatters the spinning light of the captured centrifugal Bullet Seed and causes light to shimmer down over Jesse, Seviper, the Judges, Marian and the crowd.
Well crap, that was really fucking good!
The Judges are impressed and say as much, before Marian calls in the next bunch of also-rans to make up the numbers in a montage of nameless jerks who have wasted their lives trying to compete with name characters on a television cartoon.
After they get out of the way, Dawn is called in and brings out Piplup and Buneary and creates an Ice-Bubble effect by having Buneary freeze Piplup's Bubble Beam and then bounce around the floating ice bubbles playing Doh Ray Me. At home, Dawn's mother is impressed, while backstage Ursula grumpily admits it isn't bad while Jesse remains confident it doesn't hold a candle to her performance. But Dawn isn't finished yet, having Piplup and Buneary spin up through the bubbles bursting them to create a fine mist of light/water down over the arena. The Judges give their approval, and then it is Ursula's turn, and how the hell is she going to follow up on Dawn's performance.... by having a hideous Land Shark spin a Jigglypuff on one killing claw like a basketball, that's how!
Oldest trick in the book!
Jigglypuff stops spinning and balances on one foot on Gabite's monstrous claw, then uses Rollout before Gabite rolls it up and down its shoulders and then uses Iron Tail to vault it up high into the air and blast Stone Edge at it, and Jigglypuff uses Hyper-Voice to blast the rocks into dust and float down over the crowd in the now familiar thin glowing mist. Jigglypuff uses Gyro-Ball and rolls towards Gabite which uses Sand Tomb and the two moves clash to create a pretty glowing effect, and then Gabite uses Dragon Claw which such skill that it is able to once again Jigglypuff on its claw in the same way they started the Performance without harming it. The Judges are impressed, the crowd is excited, and round one is over, now it just remains to be seen who makes it through to the next round.
WOAH! What a shock!
Jesse is surprised at least to see the two twerpettes made it in despite their bickering, while Dawn hugs Piplup and Buneary (Buneary having just recently gotten a little overly familiar hugging of Pikachu) and Brock warns her to be careful in the next round. Ursula tells her to listen to her friends (you'll notice that Ursula doesn't have any of her own!) but Dawn seems confident despite Ursula's warning that she'll use Plusle and Minun.... until the two make a sudden last minute appearance.
| BEST QUOTES |
 "Thanks Ash... wow, that was really thoughtful of you!" "Thanks... but it was Brock's idea!" |
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