256: Entei At Your Own Risk
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Entei At Your Own Risk
Ash notes that Larvitar has been asleep for a pretty long time, and when Brock and Misty agree, Larvitar cringes in fright and Ash snaps at them for scaring it. He starts coddling Larvitar and making soothing noises, and Brock and Misty tell him that he is turning it into a spoiled baby, but Ash completely ignores them, cuddling the scaly-skinned, cold-blooded lizard close to his face.
Oh like you wouldn't!
Brock knows a little bit about raising kids though, since he had to raise his Brocklings alone after his Mum "died" (or rather, just disappeared on a bender for a few years) and his Dad abandoned them to sell crack. He tells Ash that he has to get Larvitar used to the outside world, and as Ash reluctantly agrees, an Ursaring bursts out of the bushes and lets rip with a Hyperbeam straight at them, apparently furious at the idea of a human raising a Pokemon baby.
After losing the infuriated, xenophobic Ursaring, the twerps stop to catch a breath and Larvitar leaps out of Ash's arms and moves into a clearing where other Pokemon appear to be resting in what looks like hotsprings. As Ash follows Larvitar in, he steps through a tripwire alarm and a small boy with a laptop tears through the bushes like a xenophobic Ursaring, roaring out that he wants to battle Entei!
Ash is ecstatic! An Entei! Where? Where? WHERE!?!
But then the boy mutters that he made a mistake, thinking that they were an Entei, which is an easy mistake to make - legendary Pokemon of Doom/three kids. The boy tells them that he has been tracking Entei and wants to catch it, and that is why he has set up alarm in a wide ranging area of the forest that he has calculated Entei is most likely to show up in. He introduces himself as Nelson and they introduce themselves and then.... XENOPHOBIC URSARING THE FUCK OUT OF NOWHERE!
But instead of mauling them and dancing in their entrails, it leaps into one of the hot springs and immediately seems to relax. Nelson explains that the hot springs are well known for their healing properties, so the twerps call out their Pokemon to enjoy the waters. Totodile is absolutely fucking off his tree with excitement.... THE GODDAMN SUN IS SHINING AND HE THINKS HE SAW A BEE MAYBE so he dances with delight and starts to jumps into the water, only to be called up short by Ash who wants to introduce them to Larvitar. The Emo Pokemon instantly hides behind Ash's leg but Totodile ain't having none of that and rushes up, grabs it out and starts dancing happily, sending it crashing into Cyndaquil and scaring both the infants. about to jump right in, but Ash tells it to stop so that it can introduce itself to Larvitar. Larvitar hides behind Ash's leg, but Totodile pulls it out and starts to dance with it, freaking it out, and things aren't helped when hideous, ugly Phanpy tries to make friends. Ash hauls Larvitar up and assures it that the Pokemon won't hurt it, but doesn't seem to calm Larvitar any. Bayleef grabs Larvitar with its vines and begins rocking it back and forth, but that only serves to terrify Larvitar even more, and then Noctowl flies directly up to it and glares at it, because apparently Noctowl is an asshole! Larvitar lets loose with a Screech, hurting everybody's ears.
Shortly after, all of the Pokemon settle into the hot springs to enjoy the relaxing, healing properties of the water, but Larvitar stills seems reluctant. Ash tries to calm it down as Misty calls out all of her Pokemon, Psyduck flailing about madly in the water and splashing Larvitar, and Ash realises that as a Rock Type, Larvitar doesn't like water. Misty drags Psyduck out of the water as Brock calls out his Pokemon, and as Pineco and Crobat join the others in the water, Misty finds Psyduck buried happily in black sand and yells at it for being stupid, but Brock checks the sand and notes it is warm and Psyduck seems to be quite happy in there, and he calls out Geodude and Onix which quickly bury themselves in the sand, Geodude giving Larvitar a little push into the sand as well. Larvitar is horrified at being touched, but then realises the sand feels pretty good, and decides that maybe in this case it is okay. The other Pokemon notice it seems to have relaxed and decide for a little hazing fun, making a circle around it as Cyndaquil makes up a mud ball and tosses it at Totodile, which throws one back. Togepi tosses one at Pikachu (wouldn't be surprised if there was a rock inside) and Pikachu dodges just in case, and the mud slaps into Larvitar's face instead. Pikachu checks on the shocked Larvitar as Togepi roars with drunken laughter and Totodile laughs because GODDAMN THAT CLOUD LOOKS LIKE A TENNIS RACQUET KINDA! which pisses Pikachu off, but not as much as Larvitar which lets rip with a horrified Screech.
Team Rocket, meanwhile, are spying from the bushes, and James doesn't seem too keen on the idea of capturing Larvitar.
"The last thing we need on Team Rocket is another screamer," he sighs.
"What does that mean!?!?!" demands Jesse.
Hell, we'd like to know too!
But Meowth silences them with a plan.... and it is quite a sensible plan as well, as all it requires is access to a truck and disguises, which apparently they have in the middle of this forest near no visible human habitation. So moments later, a fruit truck pulls up in front of the twerps and a familiar looking woman steps out and says, "Prepare for trouble, we don't care for defiance!"
"And make it double, it's all for science" adds an oddly familiar looking blue haired man.
"As researchers, we search for the truth in food and drink!"
"We're here to say what WE think!"
"What's really important when you eat a treat, not the flavour, but the time you eat!"
Well the combination of a red haired woman and blue haired man saying a motto with the words prepare for trouble and make it double don't seem to raise any alarms in their minds, and they agree with Team Rocket that nothing is more refreshing than a cold smoothie after a hot bath. Jesse and James offer the twerps a deal that is too good to be true, saying that they want to test out their smoothies on them, so they can try them for free!
Now THIS strikes Misty and Brock as suspicious, but ol' freeloader Ash proclaims that there CAN'T be any catch, because the smoothies are for free! He and all of his Pokemon walk up into the back of the truck, the doors slamming behind them as the duo reveal themselves to be....GASP! Team Rocket!
But more importantly than all of that is Ash's angry realisation,"You lied about the fruit smoothies!"
Oh Ash, you freeloader.
All of Ash's Pokemon batter against the back of the truck while Larvitar watches, Ash ordering Pikachu to use Thunderbolt when the battering tackles don't seem to be having any effect. When Thunderbolt doesn't work, Ash orders a Razorleaf from Bayleef and Flamethrower from Cyndaquil, but neither of those seems to affect the truck doors either. Ash notices Totodile dancing about with delight (THEY'RE IN A TRUCK! AN ACTUAL HONEST TO GOD TRUCK THAT'S SO AWESOME!) and remembers an old trick that has worked in the past. By alternating Water Gun and Flamethrower, he rapidly heats and cools a section of the back of the truck before having Bayleef use Razor Leaf again, this time shattering the now brittle metal. Noctowl grabs Phanpy and Cyndaquil and flies out through the hole, which everyone else grabs Bayleef which pulls them out with Vine Whip on a tree as the truck drives past it. Larvitar spills out of Ash's hands as they fly through the air, and is caught by a Misdreavous of all things, and then Nelson pops up to tell Ash that Misdreavous is his. Apparently one of his alarms had gone off again and he'd come looking for Entei once more, only to find Ash again (maybe Ash IS Entei?) as Brock and Misty show up, having made very good time chasing after a truck. Nelson tells them that his Misdreavous has a secret attack that he plans to use to help him capture Entei, and when Ash asks what it is, Nelson tells him he'll have to battle him if he wants to find out. Ash, of course, eagerly accepts the challenge.
Meanwhile Team Rocket has pulled over to gloat over their captured Pokemon, only to discover that Ash has made good his escape. Meowth points out that at least they have a huge amount of smoothies left (so apparently they DIDN'T lie about that) but neither Jesse nor James seem too enthused about this.
Back with the twerps, Ash is trying to figure out what Pokemon to use against Ghost-Type Misdreavous, and gets the answer from Phanpy, which steps up eager to fight. The two clash with a Head butt versus a Take Down, with the latter proving slightly stronger and knocking back the Ghost-Type. Misdreavous fires back with Swift, which bounces off of Phanpy's Defence Curl, but before the little elephant can use Rollout it gets hit by Psybeam and becomes confused. Nelson declares now is the time for his secret attack, and has Misdreavous use..... Mean Look!!?!?!
Yes, Gentle Dodgers, Mean Look. The move you remove immediately from a Pokemon if you want it to learn something useful like Surf or Hyperbeam. The move you never use. The most useless move in the game next to Growl.
And it works!
Ash tries to recall Phanpy since it is obviously too confused to keep fighting, but Mean Look prevents a Pokemon from being recalled! Nelson also explains that if it is used on a wild Pokemon, it won't be able to flee from battle, meaning that if he gets a chance to face Entei, Entei can't use its amazing speed to get away.
But as Nelson is showing off though, a net suddenly drops down over Misdreavous, it's Team Rocket, and today we get a double dose of motto goodness!
"Prepare for trouble with Misdreavous in a sack!"
"And make it double with that great mean look attack!"
"To protect the world from devastation!"
"To unit all peoples within our nation!"
"To denounce the evils of truth and love!"
"To extend our reach to the stars above!"
"Mean Look Jesse!"
"Meaner Look James!"
"Team Rocket blasts off, your secret's been told!"
"Surrender now or battle the brave and the bold!"
"Dis is getting so old," sighs Meowth.
Team Rocket reveals that they've overheard Nelson's talk and decided to capture Misdreavous, so they can in turn use it to capture Entei. Grabbing out a giant vacuum, they suck up all of the Pokemon inside of the Hot Springs, creating a water twister as Onix tries to protect all of the Pokemon. Staryu manages to slip free, but Pineco finds itself sucked up inside and Brock jumps after it in an attempt to save it, only to get smacked aside by XENOPHOBIC URSARING OUT OF NOWHERE! Pineco stares down at Brock, then glows bright before..... BOOM!
The water twister tears apart in a massive explosion, and when everyone can see again, Pineco is now a Forretress! As Brock congratulates his Pokemon on its sudden, totally random evolution, Ash has Bayleef use Razor Leaf to knock Misdreavous free of Team Rocket's clutches. Team Rocket tries to kick up another water twister, but get themselves caught up instead as it runs out of control, threatening to destroy the Hot Springs. The Pokemon all attack the twister together (Onix GAROARS at it!) but nothing seems to be working and then....... MASSIVE FUCKING FLAMETHROWER OUT OF NOWHERE!
Yes from a far distant mountain peak comes a massive burst of flame that wipes the twister our and sends Team Rocket blasting off again, crashing them into the mountain in question and looking up to see.... ENTEI!
TEAM ROCKET'S BLASTING OFF AGAIN.... AGAIN!
The twerps and Nelson run up in time to see the Legendary Pokemon, and Nelson cries out that he wants to challenge it to a battle. He calls out Misdreavous and has it use Mean Look on the grumpy looking Entei, trapping it in battle before he uses Swift and..... nothing! Entei no-sells like a champ, and ignores the impact of Psybeam as well, and Nelson starts to panic and orders a Head butt, but Entei seems to have finally had enough of this and uses Roar.... and Misdreavous is returned to its Pokeball! Entei turns and stalks off, leaving behind a devastated Nelson who appears to have just realised that they don't call Entei a LEGENDARY Pokemon for nothing.
And with that, we end today's episode Gentle Dodgers. Larvitar appears to be a little more comfortable with Ash's Pokemon now, but still appears terrified of Misty, much to her chagrin. They head off again, once more heading for the Silver Conference, and once more leaving us hoping that maybe next episode, they'll finally.... FINALLY get there.
| BEST QUOTES |
 "Ash will protect you from those mean people."
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