229: Just Waiting on a Friend
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But there'll never be a missed opportunity for distraction with this lot, and when Misty and Brock suggests they stop due to the heavy mist and fog, you could forgive Ash for agreeing. But maybe the boy finally got a bug up his ass about getting to Johto. So of he goes, zooming forward and promptly going over the side of a cliff and falling to his death.
Damn, when he gets to heaven he's going to have to wait for Misty and Brock to catch up, he'll have to tell St. Peter that he's....
Just Waiting On A Friend.
It seems that Ash's obituary shouldn't be printed just yet, though, as the cliff he fell off was only about 3 feet down. Brock tells him he has to be careful in this mist, and then promptly goes over the edge himself. But when he recovers, he finds himself face to face with a Ninetales..... and a pretty lady in a kimono!
She asks him if he is okay and he leaps up with love (lust?) in his eyes, insisting he is while Ash concerns himself with more important matters, like finding out about Ninetales! He scans it with Dexter and discovers that Ninetales (the evolved form of Vulpix) is said to store a different form of mystic energy in each of its tails (it has nine of them, you know).
The girl introduces herself to Brock (whom she seems to be paying more attention to than Ash and Misty) as Lakoko, asking them to come and stay with her until the fog and mist have cleared away.
Elsewhere in the mountains, Team Rocket is absolutely miserable, desperate for food and rest. A call from Wobbuffet gets their attention and they look over a rock to see it leaning coolly against the surface, arms crossed and smugly saying its own name. Jesse calls it back into its Pokeball, but then they look up and note the twerps approaching with Lakoko and the Ninetales. Eagerly, they realise they could steal it and Pikachu and.... ahh the hell with that; they'll steal their food first, and then worry about Pokemon!
Lakoko continues to lead the twerps down the path, unaware of Team Rocket's plans to eat her out of house and home. She comes to a sudden stop, which confuses the twerps until the fog suddenly shifts and they find themselves standing in front of a massive wooden gate. The doors open and reveal on the other side a courtyard and a massive, massive mansion that they are suitably impressed by. They step through the gate and the doors start to close, Team Rocket rushing frantically up in a desperate effort to get inside. As the doors shut, Ash turns around with a quizzical look, telling Misty he was sure he heard something. They continue on, while behind a pillar Team Rocket hide with Jesse sittings on James' shoulders (the one person in the world who wouldn't appreciate it) and harshly whispering at him to stop squirming.
Inside, the twerps are presented with bowls full of fruit (odd that there is no cooked food or meat) and set to with a vengeance, scoffing it down while Ninetales nuzzles happily up to Brock, who pets it without much thought about how quickly it has taken to him.
Meanwhile Team Rocket sneaks about the mansion looking for food, and open a door to reveal...... gold? No, not gold, something even better, COOKIES! They leap into the cookie pile and begin eating hungrily, Jesse swimming like Uncle Scrooge through gold as they stuff their mouths full of food. Wobbuffet suddenly leaps out of the cookie pile and proclaims its own name through a mouth full of cookies. Jesse, James and Meowth freeze to stare at it, then figure what the hell and go back to gorging.
Meanwhile, Lakoko surprises everyone by asking Brock if he'd like to stay here with her. He immediately says yes of course (he's not thinking with his brain) and Ash and Misty are astonished, until Lakoko qualifies the statement by saying that it is much too misty for them to leave tonight, so they should stay till the morning. She heads off to prepare their rooms, and as she walks away Togepi suddenly roars with drunken laughter, catching Misty's attention. She follows Togepi's line of sight and spots a mirror, which to her shock is reflecting Ninetales.... but not Lakoko!
She gasps in fright and Lakoko and Ninetales both turn fierce gazes back at her, and suddenly the mirror slams shut. Misty is terrified and Ash is confused (more so than usual), but Brock seems oddly calm, educating them (as Pikachu looks on) by saying that the mirror is simply incapable of reflecting the beauty of Lakoko. Ash and Misty pratfall (looking like they're engaging in a little underage oral sex at the same time) and then Misty asks just how in the hell the mirror shut itself. Brock calmly explains that the mirror was obviously embarrassed at its failure to showcase Lakoko's beauty. Misty intends to see for herself though, and prepares to pull the mirror wings open. But at that time, Lakoko returns with Ninetales, which rushes straight to Brock's side. As it nuzzles up to him, Misty asks Lakoko why she lives in the mansion all along, much to Brock's horror as he quickly apologises for her rudeness. But Lakoko is not offended at all, and tells them that the actual owner of the place is currently away on a journey, but he has been gone so long that all the other staff have left, and only she and Ninetales remain as "caretakers" until he returns.... if he returns.
Brock cries at this sad story, but the tears turn to joy when Lakoko tells him that she can no longer bear to be alone, and she wants him to stay here.... with her!
Does that mean she wants to be.... married? gasps Brock and she blushes and hides her face, asking if he finds her acceptable. Well after 230+ episodes and countless rejection, a potato looks good to Brock and he immediately accepts! He leaps up, deciding the best thing for this situation is a hug (and maybe a little grope as well) so he leaps towards her, rushing forward and..... going right through her body!
Ash and Misty cry out in horror while Brock lies on the floor muttering that he may have misjudged his hug/lunge. Ash and Misty grab Brock and with frantic assurances to Lakoko that they just need to "talk" they rush into a corner and beg Brock to come to his senses..... something freaky-deaky is going on here! But Brock still refuses to see it, insisting that her skin is so delicate that she CAN'T be touched, which leads to Ash crying out the hilarious line, "OPEN YOUR EYES!"
But Lakoko, it seems, has had enough now. She sends Ninetales over to nudge Brock past her and out of the room, then turns a cold glance at Ash and Misty and tells them it is time for them to leave. The astonished twerps are lifted up with a glow of red light surrounding them (Togepi - which knows EXACTLY what is going on - roaring with laughter) and sent flying out of the mansion, through the gates and into the misty fog of the mountains.
While all this is going on, Team Rocket have had their fill of cookies (though Wobbuffet is carrying a tied-up sheet fill of cookies around its neck and on its back) and are checking more of the mansion's many rooms. This time they find.... popcorn! Yes a sea of the stuff, which they begin swimming through as they happily chow down.
Out on the balcony of the mansion, Brock sits in the "master's" chair being fanned by an adoring Lakoko while Ninetales rests its head on his lap. Ash and Misty watch all this with concern (because really, when a pretty lady starts looking at Brock with adoration, you know SOMETHING ain't right) and their suspicions are further raised when Brock's clothes suddenly change from his usual gear to an old fashioned Japanese style suit. He seems momentarily confused at suddenly being in different clothes, but Lakoko insists that he actually went and got changed, and Brock accepts this readily enough and goes back to being fawned over.
Ash and Misty head inside the mansion to try and find out what is going on, looking through books in the old mouldy rooms but finding little information.
Let's stop to think about that for a moment, gentle Dodgers. Outside of RPGs, looking at the real world, how many of you have books in your personal bookshelves that detail your lives and also mention your plans and various secret weaknesses?
Exactly, barely seven of you.
But as they look, they come across a room that features a painting of the missing owner, an old-style Pokeball, as well as the journal of Ninetales' Master.... and he looks just like Brock! Ash looks through the journal and discovers to his horror it was written 200 years ago! Which means that the man in the painting is....
Dead, he's dead, say it, and say he's dead, he's dead, he died, he ceased to be alive, and he is dead, dead, dead, dead, dead.
.... well he's something, but they leave it hanging. Anyways, he sure as hell ain't coming back ever again, and if that Ninetales in the portrait on the wall is the same Ninetales that is currently resting its head on Brock's lap.... then some freaky shit is going down!
Brock continues to enjoy the adoration of Lakoko and Ninetales, unaware that he looks exactly like their missing Master (perhaps Flint's great, great Grandfather?). But the happy scene is destroyed when Ash and Misty arrive back on the scene with Totodile, which blasts at Ninetales with Water Gun. Ninetales leaps aside, the Water Gun shooting through Lakoko's ephemeral body which causes her to disappear.... and the entire mansion suddenly changes to a rotting, broken, run-down skeleton of what it once was.
Inside what was a beautiful mansion, Team Rocket prepare to gorge on a room full of chips that suddenly turn into... leaves! Wobbuffet stares in surprise at its blanket-sack full of leaves as Jesse, James and Meowth find themselves with mouths full of greenery.
With Brock in tow, the twerps rush back to the Master's old room, where Brock notes that the handsome fellow in the painting looks a little like him. Ninetales appears in the room as well and Totodile attempts to blast it with Water Gun again but finds itself lifted up by Ninetales¹ psychic power, and Ash quickly calls it back into its Pokeball. He sends in Pikachu to Thunderbolt it, but both Ash and Pikachu are lifted up by Ninetales, barely avoiding a Flamethrower attack.
Brock steps up to the plate, lifting up the old fashioned Pokeball and demanding that Ninetales return. It stares suspiciously up at him, then the image of Brock holding the Pokeball is replaced in its mind by its old Trainer, and it happily leaps up into the energy beam and is returned to its Pokeball.
Lakoko reappears and tells them with a smile that now she can finally tell them the full story of what is going on in the mysterious misty mansion. Brock calls Ninetales out of its Pokeball again to hear the story too, but as Lakoko talks it becomes clear that she IS the Ninetales, or at least a manifestation of it.
200 years ago, the Master left on a Journey, promising he would be back within a couple of months. He left behind his full staff to care for Ninetales, but as the weeks became months, which in turn became years which in turn became decades, more and more of the staff left, until only Ninetales was left. Growing more powerful with each passing year, Ninetales drew fruit from the trees to feed itself (explaining the odd fruit dinner offered to the twerps earlier) and finally decided that enough was enough, it was time to move on. But the power of the Pokeball compelled it to remain with the mansion, unable to move on despite the ongoing march of the years. How long would this go on? It had been 200 years already and the power of a Ninetales is said to last for 1000 years, but luckily for Ninetales, Brock appeared this very night and seemed close enough to its old master to return everything back to the way it once was.
But no, Brock is not its old master, and Lakoko is not a potential wife for Brock. At best she is an illusion, at worse a freaky fox trying to get it on with a human man, but at least now Ninetales knows the truth, and maybe now it can have.... a net!
A NET!?!
"Prepare for trouble after what we've been eating!" cries Jesse.
"And make it double with this special greeting," adds James from their Happy Buddha Face Meowth Balloon, Ninetales captured in a net dangling beneath it.
"To protect the world from devastation!"
"To unite all peoples within our nation!"
"To denounce the evils of truth and love!"
"To extend our reach to the stars above!"
"TEAM ROCKET!" yells Ash, rudely interrupting the motto.
"Give Ninetales back now!" demands Brock.
"Jesse!" snaps Jesse angrily, offended at this lack of respect.
"James!"
"Team Rocket blasts off at the speed of light!"
"Surrender now or prepare to fight!"
"Meowth, Dat's right" adds Meowth, and then they all sigh miserably. They hate fighting on empty bellies.... and eating all those leaves didn't fill them up even if they are full of fibre. Anyway, they're hungry but not delirious, so there is no way they're giving back such a powerful Pokemon. They send out Arbok and Victreebell (which, of course, tries to eat James) and Ash sends out Bayleef which cuts Ninetales free with Razor Leaf. Arbok tries Poison Sting, but the sharp needles are turned back on Team Rocket by Ninetales' psychic power.
"Victreebell! Go long!" yells James, pulling the thing off of his head and throwing it at Brock. Ninetales knocks him clear, causing him to spill the old Pokeball to the ground where it shatters. Then Ninetales and Pikachu use a combo of Flamethrower and Thunderbolt to send Team Rocket blasting off.... on an empty stomach.
As morning comes, Brock shows Ninetales its Pokeball and tells it that it is now free to go, and after 200 long years it turns and heads off into the forest. Lakoko appears again, perhaps one last manifestation of Ninetales to put an end to its long association with the mansion. She thanks them and says goodbye before fading out, and Brock drops his head, smiles and tells the others they should go, probably with one thing on his mind only.
Please don't let them tell anyone he nearly made it with a fox!
| BEST QUOTES |
 "Wow. That handsome guy looks just like me."
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