127: Bout with a Sprout
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They've finally done it, that little punk and his friends have finally, FINALLY made it to Violet City.
Who remembers all Ash's worries about falling too far behind Gary and not making it to The Johto League on time?
Well, here we are a loooong time after that and he's only just made it to the first stop on his way, Violet City.
But dammit, Ash is here, and it's time for him to do what he does best and kick some Pokemon ass, Old School Indigo League Style!
First though, they'll have to find the Gym!
Yes, as usual the kids are hopelessly lost and find themselves wondering the streets in search of The Violet Gym.
Brock has his trusty map out, of course, but all he can tell them is that it's roughly north of where they are now, which really doesn't help matters.
Pikachu stops to smell the roses, literally, and falls behind the rest of the twerps, leaving it open to the kind of misunderstanding that usually befalls Ash as two kids spot it and instantly jump to the conclusion that it's a wild Pikachu.
They leap forward and grab the confused little French rodent, each laying claim to it at once. Being a boy and a girl, they lay claim in uniquely different ways, the boy tugging roughly on Pikachu's ear to try and pull it away, the girl hugging Pikachu close and rubbing their faces together happily.
Both realising that the other isn't going to relinquish their claim, the kids each grab a different paw and begin pulling, tugging Pikachu to stretching point.
Confused no longer, the easily hot-tempered rodent begins to flare up it's electric sacs with energy, ready to blast both kids into oblivion, but Ash can't allow that and charges forward to try and stop it.
He pulls Pikachu out of their hands and lifts it high as it release's it's electric load, blasting the thick little boy with volt after volt of justice delivering power (right Texans!) as the two kids innocently watch on.
"This may come as a shock to you," the smoking Ash quips, "But this Pikachu is mine."
"Awwww, we thought it was a wild Pokemon," complains the little boy.
"Zakky! Lizzie!" cries a voice, grabbing everyone's attention, "You two should be in class!"
Cue the hot young female teacher running in best Baywatch style towards them, dress clinging lovingly to the contours of her firm, feminine body.
You can practically hear the HWAAA from Brock all ready.
She skids to a stop beside Ash and the two little thieves and bows her apology to Ash after learning they were trying to heartlessly steal what was clearly his Pokemon, hoping they haven't caused any problem.
"Oh no, there's no problem!" Hwaaa's Brock, his blushing face filling the screen all of a sudden. Cutting back, we find him standing beside an irritated looking, bowed over Ash, slapping him happily (and painfully!) on the back of the head,"My little buddy here enjoys a jolt now and then!"
"Oh ho!" laughs the teacher,"How interesting." "YES!" laughs Brock girlishly, then devilishly adds, "Just like you!"
"If that's your Pikachu!" sneers Zakky, "You must be a Pokemon Trainer!"
"Yep," replies Ash, bringing all of his intelligence to bear.
"OH BOY!" gasps Lizzie.
"SO ARE WE!" brags Zakky, knowing he's the man, "CAUSE WE'RE GOING TO BE TRAINERS WHEN WE GRADUATE FROM THE POKEMON ACADEMY!"
"The Pokemon Academy?" Ash asks stupidly, forgetting he once visited a very similar institute called Pokemon University.
"Yes, The Pokemon Academy," repeats the Teacher, "Is a special school where I teach very young children who want to be Pokemon Trainer's all about Pokemon, how to train them and how to take care of them."
Brock is in tears at the thought of such a beautiful young woman being involved in such a charitable profession.
"These children are so lucky to have a sensitive, caring, loving teacher like you!" he sobs, grasping her hands in his own and shaking his head in lusty wonder, "Oooh! Ahhh! Oh! Ahhhh! OH! AH!"
Following his orgasm, he leaps backwards and clasps his hands to his chest, proclaiming for all the world to hear, "My name is Brock and I'm a Pokemon Breeder! What's your name beautiful lady?"
"I'm Miss Priscilla," replies Miss Priscilla, not disputing her beauty at all.
"My friends and I are looking for The Violet City Gym," he informs her, Ash and Misty coming into shot, "BUT IT'S MORE IMPORTANT THAT WE SHOW THE STUDENTS OUR POKEMON AND SPEND TIME HERE WITH YOU!!!!"
Ash and Misty do an admirable take at this rather important piece of news they hadn't been aware of, but who are they to argue with Brock's nuts?
The enter the Academy, where they are welcomed by James' spiritual daddy, a moustachioed, pot bellied man in purple leotard and yellow tutu.
But of course he is.
He names them honourable teachers so that they might tell all the children about their Pokemon.
The twerpy trio react with a barbarian's superstitious fear, backing away from this fearsome monster - Ateasewithhisownsexualityasaurus - with sweat-drops and arms raised to ward off evil.
We could swear Ash even whispers,"Crom!" lightly under his breath.
In any case, these pre-adolescent and adolescent children are now fully fledged, accredited teachers for this Academy, which just goes to show how strict and stringent their standards are.
Miss Priscilla introduces them to the fat, dancing man. It seems he is their Principal, Mr. Earl Dervish (and he's a whirling!) and like King Artie, he loves to party!
The twerps aren't the only ones terrified by Earl's inner peace, as even the usually unphasable French are phased, poor little Pikachu glaring up in terror at the fat man.
Togepi, however, is delighted at the sight, knowing that if this man is indicative of those shaping the minds of the future generation, than a liberal, open minded society is sure to be the result.... and those are the easiest to conquer.
Learn the lesson children, repress those that are different from you and hate all those that disagree with you. For only that way can you build up such a paranoid, military state that you will be forever safe from invaders.
And all it will cost you is freedom.
Misty, all for the Police State, decides to sow a little dissension and whispers to Miss Priscilla, asking her if Earl always twirls around like that.
Miss Priscilla, however, is an open minded liberal and happily replies that she just loves anyone who can dance with that much energy, and surely Misty agrees.
Misty just laughs nervously, sweat drop reforming as Brock joins the liberal movement for the same reasons that all men usually do, to get him some (crude expletive removed to avoid offending members of the feline species). To prove it he dresses himself up in purple leotard and yellow tutu as well and dances with Earl, crying out that if Miss Priscilla loves dancing, than he loves dancing too.
He and Earl spin around crying out happily, "Let's Duet! Spinning Like A Spinning Top! Spin All Day We Just Won't Stop! Spinning Right And Spinning Tight, Spin All Day We Just Won't Stop....."
Togepi roars with laughter at this display, likening it to the displays of repressed homosexuality inherent in College Fraternity's The Army and The Navy during pledge weeks.
Pikachu, being French, now thinks it's all part of some comedy farce and laughs along at Brock and Earl's dancing display.
Both spin along for the ride, but soon the fun is all over and Ash tries to share some of his hard earned Pokemon knowledge with the kids, enjoying the chance to lord it up over a bunch of people whom he is 'supposed' to be smarter than.
5 year olds.
"The important thing a new Pokemon Trainer has to remember," snaps Ash dramatically, "Is.... uhhhh, let's see now what was it.... it's on the tip of my tongue.... uhhh."
The children stare at Ash with open mouthed admiration as he blushes deeply and wrings his hat in his hand like an East-Ender confronted with a man in a bowler hat.
Zakky saves his dumb ass by asking for him to tell them all about Pokemon Battles, the one thing Ash is actually any good at.
Instantly the little boy is filled with confidence again, bragging about how he made it all the way to the top 16 of The Indigo League, neglecting to mention he got beaten by an ugly little punk called Richie who everybody in the world hates.
The kids are delighted by the thought of making it so far into The Indigo League, but Zakky - tough ass little punk that he is - would rather hear from a winner. After all, why should he listen to Ash if Ash is a loser?
Misty saves her boyfriend from further humiliation by clapping her hands together and asking who would like to go out to recess and meet all of their Pokemon.
"ME!" the all cry together, lifting their hands in perfect synchronicity, just like good little conformist drones.
It makes a Republican's heart proud it does.
Once outside, Brock throws out his Pokemon first, introducing the kids to Geodude (long time no see!) Zubat, Vulpix (long time no vomit) and the toothless Ga-Roar of Onyx.
Misty then sends out Psyduck, Goldeen, Poliwhirl and Staryu before Ash calls out his Pokemon - Bulbasaur, Heracross, Squirtle, Chikorita and, of course, Charizard.
The kids are delighted and eagerly play with all The Pokemon, but even this innocent scene isn't enough to dissuade the Sexual Perversion Pokemon - Heracross - from trying to get him a little Bulba-action. The feisty, homophobic Bulbasaur sees him coming, however, and whips him away angrily as Chikorita rushes to Ash's side, pushing between him and Pikachu to take pride of place beside her bitch.
Goldeen and Staryu sit uselessly in the water doing nothing while the kids stare expectantly at them, waiting for them not to suck. Meanwhile Onyx is being used as a staircase and appears to be enjoying itself, as Misty herself notes, claiming that everybody is having a good time.
Brock, desperate for an opening for a conversation with the beautiful Miss Priscilla, asks her what the story with that tower in the distance is.
Apparently that is Sprout Tower, an odd name indeed for a tower, although it actually makes sense if you're incredibly stupid. It seems there is only one supporting beam for the tower, which constantly sways and shifts, much like a Bell-Sprout.
But hang on, oh defier of the laws of physics, if the support beam sways, why doesn't the whole tower sway?
Well, rather than answer that question right now and save a big battle with Team Rocket, Miss Priscilla invites them along on a rather convenient field trip to see the tower later on that day.
As Brock throws his arm high and kicks his foot back, proclaiming he would follow her anywhere, we cut to a pissed off looking Zakky, who obviously is none too impressed by the various Pokemon.
And thus he sits, staring grimly at a very nervous looking Pikachu, who is too French to back off under even the most reasonable of circumstances.
"Come on, Pikachu," the freaky little punk growls at last, confusing Pikachu even more, "You should be my Pikachu, wouldn't you rather belong to me than Ash?"
Pikachu gasps at such a suggestion and quickly shakes it's head, irritating the spoilt little shit a great deal,"What's so great about him!?!" he spits, but when Pikachu still refuses he does something extremely dodgy, proclaiming that he's going to take him.
Like a brother in a Virginia Andrews novel, he leaps upon Pikachu and thrusts it to the ground, straddling it's behind in preparation of making it his forever.
However, unlike a sister in a Virginia Andrews novel, Pikachu neither wants it or is willing to take it, and blasts the little asshole with 50 billion volts of electricity, knocking him away.
"Pikachu!" cries Ash in shock, not getting it as always, "Cut it out!"
He rushes to Zakky's side and asks him if he's all right, but the little punk just screams at him to leave him alone.
"Is there anything I can do?" Ash asks. "You can give me Pikachu!" sniffs Zakky, much to Ash's shock, who tells Zakky that he knows he can't do that.
Dodgemaster's Note : Uh, why not? You give all of your other Pokemon away to complete strangers.
"I WANT PIKACHU!" screams Zakky, bursting into tears and throwing a temper tantrum, shaking his arms about and screaming that he wants Pikachu.
Ash, being little more than a child himself, is totally unprepared for this outburst, and the canny little Zakky takes the opportunity to push past Ash, ripping a Poke-Ball from his belt as he does so.
"Thank's for the Poke-Ball, Ash!" sneers Zakky, then rears up over a terrified Pikachu, proclaiming that he's going to catch it now.
Pikachu, not being stupid, turns and runs away, leaving the playground as a confused Zakky tries to figure out this unprecedented turn of events.
He turns and gives chase to a terrified Pikachu as Ash.... stands completely still and does nothing.
Chikorita, meanwhile, loves this unprecedented turn of events and takes the opportunity to nuzzle and chew at Ash's pants leg.
Forgetting this disturbing sight for a moment, Ash finally reaches the conclusion that maybe, just maybe, it might be a good idea for him to go after Zakky and rescue Pikachu.... or rather rescue Zakky from Pikachu, who doesn't take too kindly to people trying to capture him.
He recalls his Pokemon, including a devastated Chikorita, and tells them he'll go get Zakky. Being totally unconcerned about her student, Miss Priscilla says nothing while Misty instructs Ash to head towards Sprout Tower when he's found Zakky.
He agrees, then heads off into the forest nearby the school to find Pikachu.
And where is Pikachu? Cowering in terror from that scary little punk ass kid. It hides behind a tree, jumping in fright when it hears Zakky calling for it, but unfortunately he sees it's ears and tail sticking up from behind a bush and throws Ash's Poke-Ball at it.
Pikachu dives for cover and the Pokeball bounces up into the air, opens and shoots out a red beam of energy which sucks something up inside of it before dropping to the ground.
It shakes and twists and shakes some more, then finally it glows white and comes to a stop.
ZAKKY HAS CAUGHT PIKACHU!
Dodgemaster's Note : Hands up who believes that that is actually Pikachu inside that Pokeball. Please note that if you put your hand up, a man is going to come around to your house and slap you.
Ash, being just the sort to have a man come around to his house and slap him, gapes in shock as he hears Zakky laughing and shouting that he captured a Pikachu. He can't believe it, and who can believe Zakky's naive belief that now that he's captured Pikachu (Bellsprout) that Pikachu (Bellsprout) will like him more than Ash.
He turns to run but Ash grabs his angrily, demanding he drop it with such authority that the Earth itself listens and caves in beneath them, dropping them into a hole.
"It... it can't be them," gasps Ash, who after all this time has finally figured out who would be behind such a trick.
"Hahahaha!" laughs Jesse, "Yes it can, so prepare for trouble!"
"You fell for our plan so make it double!" chimes in James.
The camera pans up to the top of the whole, where silhouettes of Jesse and James can be seen, holding up branches and dressed in what appear to be ceremonial robes.
"To protect the world from devastation!"
"To unite all peoples within our nation!"
"To denounce the evils of truth and love!"
"To extend our reach to the stars above!"
"Jesse!"
"James!"
They are indeed in ceremonial robes, kimono's with R's on them, James wearing blue and Jesse in pink (that seems wrong somehow, doesn't it). They dance a little congo to a beat Meowth is pounding on his drum, crying out.
"Team - Rocket - blast - off - at - the - speed - of - light!" dances Jesse.
"Surrender - now - or prepare - to - fight! fight! fight!" dances James.
"Dis beat is outta sight - Meowth dat's right!" laughs Meowth, beating on the drum.
"Didn't I tell you this trap would work perfectly!" laughs Jesse, back in regular Team Rocket gear and staring down into the hole.
"And it's more economical than our other traps," agrees James.
"Yeah!" laughs Meowth, "For once we ain't da ones in da hole!"
James thanks Zakky for making their job easy by capturing Pikachu for them and Jesse calls for him to throw the Pokeball up, telling him that they'll get him out after that. She even calls him sweetheart!
"But you said we wuz gonna leave...." starts Meowth, until Jesse kicks him over onto his head.
"Don't listen to the nasty old Meowth!" Jesse calls down to Zakky as Ash tells him to hand over the Pokeball, but Zakky is as stubborn and stupid as Ash and decides to handle things himself, throwing his Pokeball up and calling for Pikachu to use his Thunderbolt attack.
Team Rocket cower in fear as the Pokeball spins in the air out of the hole, then opens to let out.... Bellsprout!
What a freaking surprise that was.
"PIKACHU'S SICK!" cries James girlishly, proving that he just might be all good looks and no brain.
"THAT'S NOT PIKACHU!" snaps Jesse angrily.
"Oh," replies James.
Meowth, meanwhile, stands in total shock, mouth hanging open, flying buzzing in and out at their own discretion. His eyes are wide and his arms thrown to the side as his entire belief system comes crumbling down around him.
"If the twerps in trouble!" cries Meowth, getting over the loss of his faith, "Then Pikachu will come running!"
Jesse and James giggle and laugh like cheeky Wood-Elves, Jesse actually covering her mouth with her hand at the thought of being so naughty.
As the camera spins about beneath a stationary shot of the trees encircling the sky, we hear Ash's voice calling for help, crying out that he's in trouble.
"Team Rocket outsmarted me again!" cries Meowth through his mega phone, tuned to midget Ash mode, "But dey're gone now, so help me get outta dis here hole!"
We think that Meowth speaking in Ash's voice might just be the cutest damn thing we've ever heard.
"Dese phony voice megaphones really work like a charm!" Meowth whispers to the others as Pikachu sneaks towards the hole.
"Hurry, before they come back!" James calls through his megaphone.
Pikachu moves up to the side of the hole, and Ash instantly calls out a warning, "Run away Pikachu it's a trap! It's Team Rocket, look out!"
Just at that moment Team Rocket - hiding up in a tree - throw out a net to capture Pikachu. Unfortunately they've gone for dramatic flair again and have thrown it in slow motion, giving Pikachu plenty of time to make it's escape.
"We missed!" cries James.
"That twerp ruined everything!" cries Jesse. "I knew you'd recognise my real voice when you heard it, Pikachu," laughs Ash, using the net (which conveniently wrapped around a tree trunk) to pull him and Zakky out.
Pikachu leaps into his arms and they hug.
"Quick! Now's our chance to catch em both!" snaps Jesse.
"CATCH 'EM ALL!" cries James, overcome with desire to suck up to Nintendo Big-Wigs.
"Great idea," agrees Meowth, then shrugs nervously, "Too bad I forgot to bring the extra net!"
They all sigh and expel breath together as Pikachu throws Pikachu up to their level, calling for the mighty French Rodent to use it's Thunderbolt Attack.
Which it does, and it hurts, and Team Rocket cry and, yes, Looks Like Team Rocket's Blasting Off Again!
"One more loss for their team and one more win for ours!" laughs Ash, joined by Pikachu and Zakky stares in admiration.
"That was cool!" he proclaims, as Bellsprout wobbles uselessly beside him.
Meanwhile, over at Sprout Tower the kids are inside the tower watching the beam sway. The reason behind the tower's unswaying ways is made clear, as the tower is built 'around' the supporting beam, which sways and shifts about inside while the kids watch in wonder.
Meanwhile, outside, Team Rocket smash into the roof after being blasted off again and we are treated to an all too brief shot - obviously thrown in by tired, horny animators - of Jesse's skirt clinging lovingly to her buttocks before she sits up.
"Where are we?" James asks as Jesse rubs her bum.
Leaving you with that delightful mental image, we go back inside Sprout Tower where Miss Priscilla gets all metaphysical on our asses, telling them that there is another reason this place is called Sprout Tower.
A lot of Pokemon Trainer's go through Violet City on their way to The Johto League, and they stop at Sprout Tower to watch the beam because it reminds them of themselves when they first started on their Pokemon Journey.
"I get it!" cries Misty, "I guess trainer's are like sprouts, aren't they!"
"Right!" agrees Miss Priscilla, who obviously got her job on looks alone.
"That's a good thing to always keep in mind," suggests Brock, pretending to agree with the heaping helping of bullshit just served up to those poor kids, "No matter how experienced a Pokemon Trainer gets, there's always room to grow!"
"Hmm," laughs Misty as Togepi silently whispers,'shit' (don't believe us, watch this episode for yourselves! "We both know a certain Pokemon Trainer who forgets that sometimes, don't we!"
"Yeah!" agrees Brock, "We'll tell Ash all about it as soon as he gets here."
Watching from the rooftop are Meowth, Jesse and James - the latter two both graciously giving us another look at their skirt and pants clinging lovingly to their buttocks (as we would all like to) - listening in on the whole thing.
"Hear that?" asks James, "The twerp must be on his way over!"
"That's right," nods Jesse, "And Pikachu's with him."
"But we'll take care of dat, won't we," chuckles Meowth, and they all share an evil, woodland laugh.
Meanwhile Zakky is still being a shit-head, glaring angrily at his Bellsprout, which copies every move he makes. "STOP COPYING ME!" he screams at the wobbly Pokemon, which swings it's leaves wildly in shock.
"Zakky," suggests Ash, "I know you caught your Bellsprout by accident, but don't you think you should make the best of it?"
"I wanted Pikachu!" sulks Zakky.... well, sulkingly, "Not some wobbly little Bellsprout!"
"I think it's kind of nice," Ash attempts, remembering from his own experience just how deadly a Bellsprout can be in the hands of the right Trainer.
"I WANT PIKACHU!" screams the little brat.
"I know...." mumbles Ash, totally unsure of how to deal with this little shit without resorting to punching him in his deserving teeth.
Back at Sprout Tower, evil music plays as Team Rocket leap through a window and Meowth takes charge.
"Okay, first we gotta get outta here!"
"Just leave it to me!" James whispers with sinister intent, then calls out Weezing and calls for the horridying monstrosity to smoke 'em out with it's smoke attack.
The smoke bellows downstairs to where Misty, Brock, Miss Priscilla and the kids are. Thinking there is a fire upstairs, they quickly lead everyone outside to safety.
Back in the forest, Zakky just won't quit, suggesting to Ash that they trade, his wobbly Bellsprout for Ash's French Rodent.
"Nooooo way!" replies Ash. Technically, of course, The Bellsprout actually belongs to Ash since it was captured with one of his Pokeballs, but Ash is too stupid to realise that.
Zakky resorts to crying, which Ash ignores, telling him that Bellsprout can be really fun.
"Bellsprout," agrees Bellsprout,"Bellsprout, Bell!"
Zakky turns to look at it and it begins to dance, spinning around in circles and crying, "Bell bell, sprout sprout, bell bell, sprout sprout."
Zakky can't help himself and starts to laugh, but the levity ends when Pikachu sniffs trouble and points it out to Ash.
The Sprout Tower is on fire! They rush the rest of the way, Zakky and Bellsprout struggling to catch up. Arriving at the tower, he asks Misty and Brock if all the kids are safe, and after ascertaining they are goes into Action Hero Ash mode and calls for Squirtle to come out and lend a helping hand.
Misty calls out Poliwag, and both use Watergun to try and fight the fire.
But, as Brock suggests, this isn't an ordinary fire, since the water doesn't seem to be helping.
Misty calls Poliwag back and the smoke begins to clear slightly, revealing something far up on the balcony.
"You've heard the expression where there's smoke there's fire!" Jesse calls down to them.
"Well fire's no match for our Weezing!"
"It's.... smoking," Meowth sleepwalks through his lines, hating being forced to make such an out-dated quip.
"What are you doing up there!" yells Ash. "The Sprout Tower is closed for renovations," Jesse calls down to them, "But why don't you come up and see what we've done with the place!"
"AHAHA!" laughs Meowth in his best Felix The Cat impersonation before he cries.....
WARNING! WARNING! THE FOLLOWING JOKE WILL ONLY BE UNDERSTOOD BY DODGEMASTER'S LEX AND TIM.
....."Oh good show, Cranky Old Bean!"
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
"We got someting inside dat'll send you into da stratosphere," Meowth really says.
Inside we find Lickitung pressed up against the swaying support beam, trying desperately to hold it in place while it's tongue wraps around one end of the saw Arbok and Weezing are using to, well, saw through the wood of the support beam.
A large rocket appears to be strapped to the beam, but what purpose this will serve is unclear.
"HEY!" cries Ash as he, Misty and Brock rush into the tower, "Knock it off!"
Jesse guffaws (yes, she actually guffaws) with laughter at Ash's amazing stupidity, telling him, "Our Pokemon love a nice piece of timber!"
"Yeah, and when dey get done sawing it, I'll send da whole joint inta orbit!" cries Meowth, sliding into view holding a remote control in his hand.
"No you can't!" cries Miss Priscilla, "This tower is very important to our Pokemon students!"
"Oh, we didn't realise, sorry," says James, and they call back their Pokemon and unwrap the rocket. They leave graciously and head out into the forest, where Jesse and James make out like rabbits.
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU MISS PRISCILLA! YOU THINK YOU CAN REASON WITH THESE PEOPLE! THEY'RE RR-TEEESTS AND NOTHING CAN STAND IN THE WAY OF THEIR ART!
What really happens is a nice piece of blackmail, as Jesse informs Miss Priscilla that, if the tower is to be saved, Ash has to hand over Pikachu.
He refuses, of course, but Pikachu sees no other recourse and moves forward to make the sacrifice. Ash calls for Pikachu to come back but it's made up it's stubborn little French mind and won't be dissuaded from it's course of action.
"I'm shocked at how easily you gave up," chuckles Jesse, picking Pikachu up in her hands.
"CHUUUUU!" replies Pikachu angrily, zapping the air around Jesse and making her laugh.
"We assumed you'd try an attack like that, so we all came prepared with boots and gloves that are insulated against electricity."
James and Meowth zoom into shot, holding up their gloved hands.
"Haha! They block to shock!"
"We lassooed a Pikachu! We Lassooed a Pikachu!" laughs James as he ties up Pikachu and Meowth dances the happy Midget Dance beside him.
"After all this time," cries Jesse happily as she zooms into shot again, looking particularly hot, "We finally got what we've been chasing you for."
She blows them all a kiss, "So goodbye twerps, and good riddance to you!"
"We've got to stop them!" cries Zakky, stating the obvious, so obvious in fact that even Ash got it.
"Don't you think I know that Zakky!" he snaps, "But how?"
Team Rocket's Pokemon continue to saw at the swaying support beam, and Ash decides to try something, reaching behind his back to....
"DON'T TRY IT!" snaps Meowth angrily, thrusting the remote control out before him, "One false move and KABLOOEY!"
"Hahahehe," laughs Meowth as Ash pulls his hand away, "No wonder you hang out in dis tower, you're justa little sprout yourself!"
"There's nothing wrong with being a sprout!" snaps Ash, who feels a little inadequate in certain male departments, "Everything that grows has to start out small!"
Yeah, keep telling yourself that Ash.
"That's right!" agrees Zakky, since he shares the same, ahem, problem that Ash does. Bellsprout, no stranger to having thin, wobbly, green protrusions....
EWWWWWWW!!!!!
....tugs on Zakky's shirt sleeve to get his attention, and after sharing a quick conversation, Zakky calls for it to use it's Razor Leaf Attack, knocking the remote control out of Meowth's paw.
"It worked!" laughs Zakky, "Good job Bellsprout!"
"Quick Arbok!" cries Jesse, feeling her victory slipping out from between her fingers, "Don't let them get their hands on that remote control!"
Arbok leaps forward, but a quick Water Gun attack from Squirtle knocks it back and Ash quickly sends out Bulbasaur to grab the remote with it's Vine-Whip.
"What's taking you two so long!" James yells at Weezing and Lickitung, who were still sawing their way through the beam, "Hurry!"
Zakky, drunk on victory, calls for Bellsprout to use it's Razor Leaf again, knocking the Pokemon away from the saw.
Jesse and James call back their respective Pokemon and turn to Meowth for advice on what to do.
Meowth figures their last chance is to use the manual over-ride on the rocket to make their getaway, and as James grabs Pikachu they all leap onto the rocket.
Meowth slams the button down and the engines flare, building up to take-off, the almost entirely sawed off beam ready to break at any moment and send Team Rocket off to freedom.
"Haha!" laughs Meowth, "This'll be da poifect gettaway!"
"This missile was our best idea ever!" laughs Jesse.
"The space program has benefits after all!" laughs James, taking a dig at the gross expenditure into a sadly ill-advised satellite defence program during The Reagan Administration.
"Do something Ash!" Misty yells at her boyfriend, and do something he does, calling for Bulbasaur to use it's Razor-Leaf attack to cut Pikachu free. Zakky, knowing his Bellsprout is a one trick pony, gets his Pokemon to do the same, and Pikachu is cut free.
Ash captures Pikachu as Bulbasaur and Bellsprout continue to blast their Razor Leaves at Team Rocket, finally cutting the ropes that tie the rocket to the beam, sending Team Rocket whizzing around like a balloon with the air let out before they smash through a window and disappear into the distance, this time without the customary, "Looks like Team Rocket's blasting off again!"
Inside the twerps watch as the beam shakes and sways about, and Ash comments that it is pretty shaky.
"Yeah," replies Zakky, "But it's strong!"
Wow, what a beautiful moment, excuse us while we go puke our guts out.
The tower finally settles and the beam continues to sway as Zakky hugs his Bellsprout, which blushes happily.
Meanwhile, Team Rocket are looking on the bright side of life, floating through the air on their rocket with smiles on their faces.
"Ahhh," ahhh's James, "This is absolutely lovely."
"You said it," agrees Meowth.
"Well they don't call us Team Rocket for nothing you know," sighs Jesse happily.
"I could go on like this forever," James smiles.
"Team Rocket," they murmur peacefully together, then their rocket explodes as fate refuses to give them their happy ending, "BLASTING OFF AGAIN!"
Poor bastards.
Back at the school Ash botches up any chance he had of leaving the kids with dignity, screwing up his goodbye speech.
Luckily the kids are in awe of anyone over the age of 10 anyway, and he's able to get away with it. Zakky, meanwhile, is hopeful that with hard training and work he can one day evolve his Bellsprout into a Weepingbell and then maybe into a Victreebell.
"Yeah, and maybe we can battle some day!" smiles Ash, which is polite for, "I can't wait till you're old enough for me to legally kick your ass."
Brock doesn't want to go however, wishing he could stay with Miss Priscilla forever. And shock horror! She says he can!
"You mean I can stay at the school and teach with you!" gasps Brock happily.
"NO!" laughs Earl, waltzing his way in holding a piece of paper, "But if you fill our this application you can stay and teach dance with me!"
"ARRRGH!" arrrgh's Brock, slipping quickly away to rejoin Ash and Misty.
"You side-stepped that one nicely," chuckles Misty as Togepi roars with evil laughter.
They wave goodbye and head away, the kids and teachers waving goodbye as Ash finally gets a move on to try and find The Violet Gym and maybe earn his first badge for entry into The Johto League.
That wasn't important, however, according to the narrator, who tells us the important message to be learned this day was, "Sometimes little sprouts.... can stand very, very tall!"
Yeah right buddy, name one black man who has ever had to say that.
| BEST QUOTES |
 / "Team Rocket outsmarted me again! But dey're gone now, so help me get outta dis here hole!"
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