119: Flower Power
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This episode, known as The Misty Mermaid, was a travesty, an injustice that could never be forgiven and never reconciled.... until now.
Yes, that horrifying incident which saw James - dressed in a ballerina's outfit and looking very pleased with himself - muttered in a far deeper voice than usual,"And next time we steal mens clothes," despite the fact that Jesse herself was wearing pants and a shirt.
How could this travesty have been rectified?
By Flower Power!
Yes, that twerpy trio have finally gotten out of the woods and come across a real city, one with big buildings and skyscrapers and a Pokemon Centre and pollution and everything!
Gee Golly, ain't it grand!
Standing on a hill overlooking the city, hands resting on a rail set up to prevent midgets committing suicide, Ash is very eager to get in and take a look around as Brock explains that the city is called Flaroundo.
Misty is all excited as well, hoping to do a little sight-seeing, but an aggravated Brock informs her that he can't relax or enjoy the sights in the knowledge that there are so many girls that need protection.
"Protection from you," mutters a jealous Misty.
In any case, off they go.
The place is crowded and they seem a little awestruck, Misty wondering what they should do first.
"Check out the Pokemon Exhibition!" suggests a young lady, handing Ash a flier.
"What's a Pokemon Exhibition?" asks Ash.
...
What is a Pokemon Exhibition?
Sigh.
What is a Pokemon Exhibition?
For the sake of our good lord Jesus Christ, Ash can you BE any more stupid!?!
Do you think that maybe, just maybe, perhaps it could possibly be - perhaps! - an Exhibition of Pokemon?
A controversial theory true, but one that needed to be spoken.
The girl explains with a happy smile - a cruel mask shielding her inner rage/boredom/sense of futility at her miserable job - that a Pokemon Exhibition is a Giant Outdoor Pokemon Entertainment Festival held every year with Trainers and Pokemon from all around the world putting on shows.
Misty and Brock get pretty excited about this, it seems they read up on this very festival in the last issue of one of the many Pokemon magazines we never see them read.
Ash wonders out loud if maybe he could put on a show with his Pokemon, leading to the inevitable joke when Misty asks if he means a stage show and he tells her no, he meant a television show.
"YAAARGHHHH!!!!" they all yaaarghhhh as they put on shock poses and try desperately to hold them.
"Now who would watch anything like that?" asks Misty, raising the ire of the evil multi-billionaire villain behind Nintendo, who sends a deadly subliminal image of decapitated Pikachu's in warning of anybody messing with his cash cow.
After that disturbing image, we cut to Brock dragging Ash and Misty along behind him like a determined mother in a shopping mall, the tanned and toned Breeder wanting to show them some real entertainment.
Said real entertainment is not the strippers Dodgemaster Tim was hoping for, but amusing, entertaining things like a Flareon leaping through a ring of fire (ummm, it's already on fire, who cares!) and an Oddish balancing on an Electrode (we thought they exploded if they felt crowded by humans? And there are plenty of humans about), a disco king dancing with some Primapes, an Alakazam yucking it up by carrying one regular spoon and one ridiculously over-sized one which he actually managed to bend with his psychic powers, as well as a water fountain display involving two Slowbro, a Starmie, a couple of Squirtles, two Krabbies, two Poliwhirls and a couple of Psyducks.
Ash and co are very impressed by all of this, but a larger crowd seemed to have gathered elsewhere, and as Ash looks over he notes that a couple of strange looking Pokemon are leaping about excitedly, getting well over ten feet into the air.
Whipping out his trusty Pokedex which he always uses to identify new Pokemon (as well as ones he sees every second of the day) he is informed that the hula dancing looking Pokemon is a Bellossom, the Flower Pokemon, when these Pokemon move, their delicate petals rub together, creating a pleasant sound, the Bellossom are also known for their unique, acrobatic, dancing abilities.
"They sound pretty neat," smiles Ash.
"You wanna get a closer look," asks Misty, words that many boys in Ash's situation would love to hear but which the ignorant little bastard child misses completely.
They moved closer, spotting the two Bellossom jumping around a clapping Trainer in black boots, thigh-high yellows socks, a tiny blue mini skirt and green and black top, her hair pulled into a bun.
Behind her is a very fat man in a yellow shirt.
Hehe.
The Bellossom, ignoring the fat man (as we all must) do several more moves, causing Misty to note that they are just like Gymnasts while Brock notes that their trainer has done a very good job.
Togepi suddenly erupts into howling bursts of maniacal laughter, whether from some private joke, at something Brock said or just the entire absurdity of his disguise as a helpless infant we are unsure, all we know is that he is evil, eeeeeeee-vil!
"And now for our gravity defying grand finale!" cries the Trainer, her Bellossom moving into position on opposite sides of the square they are performing in. But all is not as professional as it appears, as the Trainer admonishes her Pokemon to keep calm, because this time they'll get it.
The first Bellossom charges the second, which braces itself and then catches the first as it leaps up, flipping it backwards through the air as the Trainer calls for it to loop-de-loop. It starts out well enough, but suddenly it clenches up in fear and spirals out of control, slamming right into Ash (sigh, didn't see that one coming!) and knocking him onto his ass.
The Trainer apologises and makes to help Ash up, telling him that he was in the right place at the right time, but before she can Brock leaps in and grabs her hand.
"Arrrh! My names Brock and as far as I'm concerned anyplace you are and any time you're there is the right place and the right time for me!"
She just looks at him, confused, an expression shared by her Bellossom.
"There's a time and place for everything," scowls Misty, dragging a kicking, flailing Brock away, "But for you it's not here and it's not now!"
We cut to a lovely street scene, people walking through a picturesque looking park, shaded from the sun by the leaves of the trees lining the lane, all in all a peaceful scene.
Broken, of course, by the horrendously garish pink colouring of the picnic tables set up on the grass by the trainer as she thanks Ash and his friends for saving her Bellossom.
Ash in turn thanks her for putting on a great show.
"Yeah!" cry Misty and Brock together, "Heres to you!"
They all drink their sodas, Pikachu and Togepi sharing one drink with two straws.... ewww! Who knows where that freaky egg thingy has been!
The Trainer introduces herself as Bailey, noting that the two Bellossom with her are her star performers, Bell and Bella.
"Bellllll-la!" acknowledge Bell and Bella.
Ash introduces himself and Pikachu, Misty introduces herself and Togepi before Brock leaps forward, proclaiming who cares about Pokemon, his name is....
Misty, overcome by jealous lust and Togepi's formidable anger at being brushed aside as a nothing, grabs him by the back of his collar and pulls him back, growling at him,"What do you mean who cares about Pokemon!"
Ash asks Bailey if she plans to try the Loop-De-Loop trick again the following day, but she seems unsure and Bell looks like it's about to burst into tears.
You would to, if you not only sucked, but were the Star Performer and still sucked.
It seems Bell used to do it perfectly but now it has trouble performing...... ahhh, performance anxiety, a trait not to be found amongst the real stars of the show.
TEAM ROCKET!
Yes, Jesse, James and Meowth wander about the exhibition, looking about at the crowds and excitement.
"There's something very festive in the air," notes Jesse, "Wouldn't you say James?"
"I though it was Meowth," replies James deadpan, a line which deserves a rim-shot to follow it up.
Meowth has figured that things are building up to some kind of street performance, which instantly delights the Rr-teests in Jesse and James.
"That sounds like it's right up our alley!" proclaims James happily.
...
Well, if anybody knows what it's like up.... no, forget it, we're not going to say it.
Jesse knows that this is the perfect opportunity for her and James to showcase their many talents, and Meowth - standing alone in the centre of the square - laughs that it would be more exciting if either of them had any talent.
Enter Jesse, all dolled up in a Spanish Senorita's outfit, stomping her feet and clapping her castanets as well as showing some delightful cleavage as she threatens to stamp all over a shocked Meowth.
She cries out that the Flamenco is in her blood and Meowth replied with some inane comment about blood pressure which is ignored by everyone as it finally, FINALLY happens, and the bitter memories of The Misty Mermaid are finally laid to rest.
In the words of The Rock, "FINALLY!!!!! The translators.... have accepted..... James' homosexuality!"
Dancing in on his tip-toes, dressed in THE EXACT SAME ballet outfit as he had in The Misty Mermaid (if he really wanted to steal mens clothing then why did he keep this outfit, huh? HUH!?!) clutching his hands together in joyous gayinicity, eye clenched shut, mouth wide open as he giggles and giggles and laughs and cries with joy at the unbridled delight of his homosexuality.
Yes, he is James, yes, he is gay, and yes, everybody has finally accepted it.
With a last groan of pain, The Misty Mermaid collapses into obscurity, the horrid translation lost forever to the comedy sections of Pokemon History books, kept in a sickly parody of life only by Rocketshippers who desperately cling to the 2 pieces of (easily argued) proof of James' so-called heterosexuality.
Somewhere children are laughing.
Somewhere children shout.
But not in old Rocketshipper land.
For good old James has.... come out!
Jesse and James clutch hands and turn to face Meowth in a tango pose, telling him that they're going to become rich and that he is going to help them.
"Arrrh, I don't have to dance, do I?" gasps Meowth.
"Oh no," they reply before Jesse (who is leading, of course) spins James about, making him go 'eeeeeee' with delight, "We'll do all the dancing."
"Then what do I gotta do?" asks Meowth.
"Just be yourself!" they laugh.
Getting a stage from somewhere, they leave a pissed off Meowth standing to the side, Jesse hawking to the crowd, crying for them to come over and see the worlds only walking, talking, squawking Meowth!
James, just happy to be on the stage, stands to the side with a big old goofy grin on his face as the crowd gathers, murmuring that this should be interesting, what could Meowth say.
Meowth himself is asking this question, as he has no clue what he might say as well. He is soon put on the spot, though, when Jesse grabs him and slams him onto the podium.
The crowd waits impatiently for him to talk, one wit proclaiming, "What's the matter? Cat got your tongue?"
Waa waa waaaaah!
Finally Meowth snaps, throwing his arms behind his oval head and crying out, "Meeeeeoooowwwthhh!"
"You call that talking?" gasps the crowd, "What are you trying to pull?"
"There will now be a short intermission," gasps James as he and Jesse haul Meowth up and drag him away with a,"Heeeee!"
"What's the matter with you Meowth? Why didn't you say something?!" asks Jesse.
"Because... I get... very inhibited... when I'm being exhibited!" pants a panic-stricken Meowth.
"But the crowd won't give us a cent if you don't talk!" scolds James.
"I can't tink of nuttin to say to all dem people!" complains Meowth.
"Who cares! Just say any old thing!" snaps James, a big believer in improvised the-a-ter.
"I will not insult my public with an unscripted performance," sniffs Meowth haughtily.
"I thought I was supposed to be the Team Rocket prima-donna!" growls Jesse (sorry darling, James scooped up that position fairly early on) before turning away and mumbling something before returning with a script.
"Here," she snaps,"Go outside and read these jokes."
"I don't know," warns James, "Comedy is tricky."
"It's all in da delivery!" laughs Meowth. Back outside Jesse and James are all show-people again.
"Sorry for the interruption!" Jesse starts.
"Now to delight and amuse you, we present to you the amazing Meowth!" finishes James.
They slide off-stage with a flourish.
Meowth is all confidence now, impressing the crowd as he talks aways. They can't believe it! A real talking Pokemon!
Yeah, but just because he can talk doesn't make him funny folks, as his first joke proves.
"What's a Pokemon with allergies say?" asks Meowth.
"Peek-ACHOOooooo!"
The crowd look on in stunned silence.
Meowth checks his next joke.
"When should a Pokemon Trainer make an appointment to see the Doctor?"
"When his bulbasaur!"
Jesse and James are rolling in the aisles....
well technically there aren't any aisles and they're not rolling but.... well.... SHUT UP!
J & J start zooming around with empty soda cans, hoping to get some donations, but people are leaving faster than they arrive, and soon Team Rocket find themselves almost without a crowd.
"HEY!" cries Jesse to two free-loaders leaving, "The show isn't free!"
"If it isn't it should be," snaps one.
"Yeah, those jokes are the worst!" growls the other.
"Meowth is just getting warmed up! The funny stuff is on the way" cries James, blocking them from leaving, then with a 'heeeeeeee!' he rushes to Meowth's side and whispers into his ear.
Dodgemaster Tim's Note: This 'heeeeeee' noise reminds me of the time I startled a porn-star and made her run away squealing her own name in fright.
This is a true story, and has no place in this episode guide, I just love telling it!
Dodgemaster Lex's Note: Sigh.
"They'll love this one!" cries Meowth with a laugh as James stands up and beams happily at the crowd, "Hey did you hear about the low fat Pokemon?"
"CATERPIE!"
The crowd stares, Meowth poses bravely, James beams.... and then a question mark appears first over James' head, then those of the crowd before James snaps and yells at Meowth.
"BUTTERFREE! NOT CATERPIE!"
"Butterfree! Caterpie! What's the difference!" growls Meowth angrily.
The crowd leaves, until only Jesse remains to watch James and Meowth feuding furiously.....
Dodgemaster's Note: If this were Charles In Charge or some similar themed wacky eighties t.v sitcom, this argument between a cat and a homosexual man with blue hair would have been misconstrued by the Crowd as the real show and they would have gotten rave critical reviews and gone on to great success.
Alas the eighties are long gone, with it the Flock Of Seagulls hair-do, INXS and Billy Idol.
But Michael J. Fox battles on, God bless his celebrity heart!
Belatedly James and Meowth realise the crowd is gone, and a lone Jesse and her empty soda can mumbles that at least they managed to stop the show (we think the real joke here is supposed to be they were show-stoppers, and something got muddled in the translation) before Meowth moans that it wasn't his fault.
"If you're delivery had been better we would have been a hit," sniffs a miffed James.
"You wanna see a hit I'll show you a hit believe you me!" growls Meowth.
"We needed you to warm up the crowd, not to cool them off," complains Jesse.
"Now they'll never get to see me and Jesse dance," sniffs James. "And you tink dats a bad ting?" asks Meowth. "We would have put on a sensational show, James," gasps Jesse in wonder as she thinks of how good she would have been.
"The best!" cries James bravely.
"My Flamenco would have been all the rage!" cries Jesse.
"And I would have done a leap right off the stage!" adds James, doing just that after spinning around.
Suddenly they're back in their outfits again, Jesse a Spanish Senorita and James a glee-filled ballerina.
"They would have gone ma for my glad pirouettes!" laughs James as he glides by.
"And I'd drive them wild with my great castanets!" cries Jesse.
Oh.
Yeah!
Do you know how long we've waited for the translators to address the fact that yes, Jesse does have a fantastic set of castanets!
Joy!
"James, maybe there's still a chance for our dancing dreams to come true." suggests Jesse, back to back with James.
"I agree so what do we do?" asks James.
"Luckily I have a ba-rilliant idea!" laughs Jesse, all the while music playing in the background.
"That worries me!" moans Meowth.
We cut to the park and the road beside it, where a number of people are wondering about enjoying the scenery.
Suddenly a large plume of dust shoots up on the horizon and before our eyes a large machine charges forward, Jesse, James and Meowth standing atop it. Jesse is clapping her castanets together....
.... ahhh, what an image!
and James has his arms wide, moving his legs back and forth as tip-toes on the spot, crying for the crowds to make way, make way, rr-teeests coming through!
And yes, oh glorious followers of Dodge, he DOES say Rr-teeests!
Sitting at his picnic, Ash overhears and recognises the voices of Team Rocket. He charges in the way and throws his arms wide, yelling at them that they can't just barge in here.
Why the hell not you little shit? This is an open Pokemon Exhibition free to trainers to come in and entertain others, there are no restrictions on people Ash not liking entering it you little bastard, how dare you throw the elitist views of your Father's upbringing onto poor Jesse and James, who only want to entertain.
How dare you!
Bailey asks Ash who they are, but it's Team Rocket who answers, going into a clever variation on their motto.
Jesse laughs, clapping those wonderful castanets of hers together again as she says,"Prepare for trouble and a dance!"
James slaps his hands together and throws his arms out before him, legs crossing over each other as he happily informs us.
"I'm wearing tights instead of pants!"
"To protect the world from devastation!"
"To unite all peoples within our nation!"
"To denounce the evils of truth and love!"
"To extend our reach to the stars above!"
"Jesse!"
"James!"
"Team Rocket blast off at the speed of light!" finishes Jesse, stamping one foot up and down.
"Surrender now or prepare to fight!" adds James, spinning about and posing gloriously.
"Ta-Da!" cries Meowth as the spotlight flashes onto the REAL heroes of Pokemon.
But the pretender to the throne wants them gone, and Ash calls for Pikachu to help him get rid of these evil monsters who want to entertain the crowds at an open Pokemon Exhibition.
"Hold it Ash!" cries Bailey, and at first is appears that the young lady is going to tell Ash to stop being such a jack-ass and let them perform, since it's their inalienable right.
But instead, the jealous bitch - angry that these three might show up her defective Bellossom - call on the other trainers to help her fight against Team Rocket for daring to enter the Exhibition and upstage them.
"Hmm," sniffs Jesse,"Well if it's a battle you want..."
"Then it's a battle you shall have," finishes James.
A 70's hair-do looking Trainer sends out Alakazam, still holding one small and one large spoon, which uses it's Psychic attack, lifting their bulldozer, turning it upside down and dropping Team Rocket down to the concrete.
They angrily leap back up, an intense looking James refusing to let anything break his concentration, still balancing on his tip-toes.
Jesse sends out Arbok and James sends out Victreebell, and after the obligatory 'Victreebell eats James' joke - which is made funnier this time by James hopping about in his tutu crying,'Arrrgh! I have my public to think about! Heeeeeee!' - the real battle begins.
Arbok fires it's Poison Sting attack at The Bellossom, which easily dodge out of the way. James - with Victreebell still clutching firmly to his head - calls for Victreebell to attack as well, but The Bellossom easily dodge to The Twerpy Trio's delight.
Meowth roars for Arbok and Victreebell to fight back, and they charge the two Bellossom together, which easily leap out of the way, causing Team Rocket's Pokemon to crash into the ground and then scream in pain as The Bellossom slam into their backs, attempting to viciously crush the spines and spirits of their opponents like an enraged Tonya Harding.
The Bellossom then use Sleep-Powder to knock out both Arbok and Victreebell.
"Arggh! My poor baby!" cry Jesse and James together, rushing to scoop up their hurt Pokemon.
"I think we've been upstaged!" cries Jesse.
"Let's make a grand exit!" gasps James, and he and Jesse scoop up their respective Pokemon and charge away, Meowth crying out in his distinctive Brooklyn dialect.
"We'll be back for an On-Coor-E!"
That's encore, folks.
The Bellossom leap up happily as the Trainers and the Twerpy Trio all cheer at the way those two young humans and one Pokemon were chased away for daring to think they could actually entertain some people at this open Pokemon Exhibition. Safe in their knowledge that their closed-up little community doesn't have to suffer the indignity and trouble of actually growing and evolving to suit new tastes and styles is extremely relaxing for them.
We suspect this Pokemon Exhibition may be a cover for The Young Republicans Convention.
But all is now sweetness and light, we're afraid, there are consequences to your heartless actions, Young Republicans, and now we see the bitter results.
After being beaten up and chased out of town for trying to join in on the fun, we find Rr-teeeests Jesse, James and Meowth hiding out in a squalid back-alley, forced to eat meat-balls from a single frying pan, James and Meowth fighting over the last one before Jesse moves in for the steal, gobbling it down as James and Meowth stare at her in slack jawed hunger.
Yes, just like all creative people who find themselves living under a Republican Government, times are tough now for Jesse and James, and despite what Party Political Broadcasts would have you believe they did not bring this upon themselves.
This is the exact same situation as many African Americans found themselves in during Segregation, the same situations many liberals were in during the McCarthy Witch-Hunts for Communists and homosexuals for much of the 20th Century.
A grave injustice has been committed here, and it cannot go unpunished. But what recourse do Team Rocket have?
They tried to join in and were attacked, beaten and chased off for daring it, now they can choose to slink off into the night like beaten dogs with their tails between their legs or they can choose to fight for the right to entertain and dance and sing and be happy.
But how to fight? By protest or by power? By diplomacy or by force? This is where Jesse and James always fall short, seeking revenge when they should seek change, setting themselves on a vicious cycle as the illegal actions they are forced into appear to justify the means of those individuals who forced them into the situation in the first place.
Just ask any Republican, they'll all proclaim that 'They brought it on themselves'
And thus, Team Rocket in an alley, miserable from lack of money, food and tolerance. It's at this moment that a wind blows a flier into Jesse's face and pulling it away she reading the mocking legend,"Come one, come all."
Yes, come one and come all, as long as you fit into the parameters of the elitist bastards who run the place.
The flier is for the talent show to be held the next day, and Meowth hits upon the idea that if they steal the talented Pokemon that will be showing off there, they can give them to their Crime-Lord Boss, get paid, eat and buy their way into Republican Society (where they will be tolerated for their money but never truly embraced).
That night Togepi re-enacts a horrifying moment familiar to all those who saw Pokemon2000 (or Revelation : Lugia if you prefer) in which it sunk it's horrendous mind into a multitude of Bellossom and caused them to dance for it's evil amusement.
Now it does the same, causing Pikachu to join in on the act while it also pirouettes about, drunk on it's own power as it casts the illusion of a playful infant.
Bailey, Ash, Brock and Misty watch on from a nearby table, where Bailey is explaining that she first used dancing as a cross-over to battling, but when she saw what talented dancers they were and how happy they were doing it she decided to forego battling and move onto dancing as well.
So they got their asses whupped in their first battle, right lady?
Bailey hopes to turn her Bellossom (which are imitating Pro-Wrestling Tag Team Too Cool's dance steps as she speaks) into the greatest Pokemon Dancing Troupe ever.... and she can't really fail if she keeps on the path she's on now, which is destroying, beating, attacking any and all competition that gets in her way.
After telling them about herself, she asks The Twerpy Trio to tell her about them. Their answers are far shorter than her own long assed story. Misty wants to train Water Pokemon, Brock wants to be a Pokemon Breeder (snicker) and Ash wants to be The Greatest Pokemon Master of all time.
With that out of the way, Ash asks her how her Bellossom were able to defeat Team Rocket using only dance moves, and she explains to the thick-headed little turd that dancing and fighting are actually quite similar.
"HUH? WHAT? THEY ARE?" gasps Ash, as if he's just been told some monumental secret.
She explains that dancing improves footwork and rythym, making it easier dodge and co-ordinate attacks, and invites Ash to the workout she'll be having tomorrow to see what she means.
Good looking girl sweating in tight lycra while flexing and twisting her body?
Brock will be there!
The next morning the workout is already on, Pikachu struggling to keep it's footwork in time with The Bellossom. It does manage, however, which makes Bailey - hiding her rage behind a sickly sweet smile - up the ante by throwing in some backflips.
But Pikachu manages these as well, so Bailey throws in a complicated manouver of side-sweeps, twirls and poses.
But Pikachu, with the stubborn arrogance all the French possess, manages to keep up and is posing with The Bellossom when they finish.
Ash claps and guffaws stupidly while Bailey swallows her bile, bites back her rage (The Bellossom will likely recieve a sound beating tonight) and bends down to congratulate Pikachu and offer it advice on how to use those steps in battle in the future.
Following some more disturbing imagery of decapitated Squirtle heads, we find Bailey showing off by getting her Bellossom to do the dangerous Loop-De-Loop move they screwed up earlier. She offers them advice, tells them what to do and when to do it and.... again Bell is halfway through when it loses it's rag and flails about in the air before Ash catches it.
Watch Bailey's face very closely here, when she first charges in she has a pissed off look on her face and she actually glares as Bell, but when Ash turns to look at her she quickly softens her face and lets her eyes grow wide and expressive, telling Bell that it's all right and they can just leave The Bell Loop-De-Loop out of the act.
Hmmm! Pokemon Beater.
Cut to the talent show, a huge auditorium and what looks to be thousands of people gathered around to see the elitely chosen participants do the same, stale old tricks as every year.
But this year things might turn out a little differently, as we travel below the Auditorium and discover three men tied up, and up on stage in their place?
Jesse and James!
Wearing masks to shield their true identities (because EVERYBODY has hair like they do!) they announce that, although they can't tell the crowd who will win this year, they're positive it will be a big surprise.
They then introduce the first contestants, those same hate-filled shallow, unchanging elitists who kicked Team Rocket out not so long ago.
"With that kind of introduction we'd have to drag them offstage!" laughs James to the crowds delight.
"Take it away!" cries Jesse.
Again the crowd cheers, but then they freeze, frozen by the shocking arrival of something new in their stale, tired old schedule. Meowth is atop the giant Auditorium, clutching a giant net and, quipping horribly in his own unique style, proclaims that, though he might not be able to dance the flaminco, he's great when it comes to Casting-nets!
Sigh.
The net lowers over the Elitists' Pokemon, and after Meowth ties it to the basket of the Meowth Balloon, grabs the rope and floats away, Jesse and James grip onto the end of the rope and float up to.
Bailey cries out for them to return her Bellossom, then glares at Jesse and James as they float past her (note how the Elitists do nothing to grab the rope themselves, unable to actually actively do anything for themselves after years of having others do their dirty work for them), noting that they look awfully familiar.
"That's probably because Team Rocket's familiar and we're pretty awful too," laughs Jesse.
"Ta-Ta Twerps!" laughs James.
Ash, Misty and Brock charge up onto stage, desperate to do something but helpless to stop Team Rocket this time.
Ah? What about Charizard?
Suddenly Ash remembers something his Daddy learnt himself a long time ago. When in doubt, sex is the answer.
Or in this case, a sexual pervert!
"Heracross!" cries Ash, calling out The Sexual Perversion Pokemon and telling Pikachu to get on it's horn.
EWWWWWWWWWW!!!!
His plan is soon clear, Heracross' sexual frustration should give it the required strength to toss (GETCHA MIND OUTTA DA GUTTA!) Pikachu high enough to save the Pokemon of the Elitists.
Heracross does just so, sending Pikachu up past the rope, a surprised Jesse and James, startled Pokemon and shocked Meowth before it lands on The Meowth Balloon and hits it with a Thunder-Shock, smashing it into nearby trees, causing James to let out a little "hooooh!"
Love That James!
Ash leads his new Elite pals to the crash site, where Pikachu appears to have landed safely despite everyone elses pain.
Ash demands Team Rocket hand over The Pokemon they stole, but Jesse demands a battle first, sending out Arbok while James chooses Victreebell and, of course, suffers the indignity of getting his head swallowed... and not in the good way.
Pikachu attacks, dodging Arbok's Poison Stings with the new dance moves it learnt, dodging Victreebell's Take-Down attack with a reverse Michael Flatley before hitting a Flash-Dance finale to dodge a Double Tackle Attack from Arbok and Victreebell both, leaving them lying on the ground in pain.
James demands Victreebell get up and use it's Wrap Attack, which it attempts, catching Pikachu by one foot and holding it up in mid-air like a helium balloon as Arbok takes the longest, slowest flying leap through the air in history, getting inexorably closer to Pikachu with every 25 minutes that passes, while Bailey frees her Bellossom which take the opportunity to - wonder of wonders! - use their Loop-De-Loop dance move, crashing Bell hard into Arbok's face and knocking it off to the side.
Guess nobody saw that coming.
Arbok is called back and Pikachu uses it's Thunderbolt to shock Victreebell, finished off by the two Bellossom which team up to use a Tornado Twister on Team Rocket, sending them spiralling through the air after getting hit by a mini-tornado.
"I feel like I'm dancing on air!" laughs Jesse.
"Those Bellossom turned things around!" chuckles James.
"Yeah, this is a real twist ending," mutters Meowth sarcastically.
Looks like Team Rocket's blasting off again.
Yeah, they get a beating again, but at least they got a great attitude!
Pikachu quickly poses with the two Bellossom while Ash cheers them on, until he suddenly remembers that a number of other Pokemon were involved in a potentially fatal air-crash.
"Uhhh, they all right?" he asks.
They're fine, miraculously, and are all being hugged by their horribly corrupt trainers, who stood by and did nothing while they were being captured, just stood there and watched the rope slowly float away while Jesse and James just wandered over and, without any fuss, took the rope in hand and even more slowly floated away.
Bailey informs Ash that he would be a pretty good Dance Trainer, but Ash is too stupid to realize this is a thinly veiled insult and thanks her for calling him a fag.
Back at the exhibition, The Bellossom dance and then finally perform a perfect Bell Loop-De-Loop to the crowds roaring ovation while Bailey bows in the limelight of the crowd and enjoys the self-congratulatory patting on the back, well wishes and encouragement of her equally corrupt and morally dead peers.
After all, isn't that what a Republican Convention is all about?
But enough of Republicans, let's cut to Team Rocket, who despite their defeat and beating from Elitist Republicans are still cheerful and happy.
"Let's take another spin around the town," Jesse manages to dizzily get out, still spinning around in circles, albeit on the ground this time.
"Aren't we taking an awfully roundabout route?" asks James, also in a spin.
"Is this what they mean by a whirlwind tour?" moans Meowth as they whirl away into the distance.
And thus ends Flower Power, the episode which finally put to rest the horrid after-taste of that foul monstrosity - The Misty Mermaid - and left it buried and gone forever.
Pokemon Johto is truly a fantastic series, recapturing all of the joys of the first series, including finally making it clear once and for all that yes, James is gay.
James is gay.
Gay is James.
James gay is.
Is James gay?
Gay James is.
James is gay.
Hooray!
| BEST QUOTES |
 "How can I relax when there's a whole city of girls that need to be protected?" "Protected from you."
 "Hey guys, do you think I could do a show with my pokemon?""You mean a stage show?""No, a television show.""Now who'd watch anything like that?"
 "I thought I was supposed to be the Team Rocket Prima Donna."
 "Ar-teests coming through!"
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