294: Gone Corphishin'
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James declares it is the perfect day as he and Meowth stand on the beach on a clear and beautiful day, Meowth agreeing it is the perfect day.... to catch that sneaky Pikachu! A wave crashes against the shore and water droplets glisten down around the posing James and Meowth dramatically.
"Meowth, who is number one?" asks James.
"We is, dat's who!" Meowth declares.
"WHAT A BLAST!" they squeal together, throwing their arms up together.
"Oh, give it a rest," sighs Jesse, relaxing on a deckchair beneath a sun umbrella, enjoying the summer sun and a cool drink, saying they should lighten up and relax since they're on a sunny island resort.
James and Meowth insist they can't be lazy! They need to have a can do attitude! But Jesse replies that there is no reason to do today what can be put off tomorrow. James and Meowth are shocked, it is this type of lazy thinking that sees them constantly failing in their goals. But Jesse isn't getting up, and Wobbuffet agrees from its own deckchair. James and Meowth rush over to Wobbuffet, shocked that it is following Jesse's bad example, and then James demands a strategy meeting but Jesse isn't interested, telling him that he and Meowth can work themselves into a mess if they want but she isn't going anywhere. But as she lazes, something approaches from the ocean, churning through the water and then crashing into Team Rocket, sending them flying off into the air.
"We're blasting off too soon!" they cry, and they're right! But as whatever crashed into them tips over their deckchairs and then burrows through the sand back into the water it is clear that for the time being at least, Team Rocket are already going, going, going....
Gone Corphishin'
Ash wakes in the morning and rushes to the beach with Pikachu, the two of them bravely posing as James and Meowth did in practically the exact same spot not so long ago. The waves crash behind him as little Lotad wanders past them, and they jump down next to it to splash water on their faces.
Meanwhile a little further back at the campsite, Max yawns and stretches behind May as she sticks a hard, long object into her mouth that has a frothy white liquid on the end.
Yes, she's brushing her teeth like a good girl!
Brock prepares breakfast with help, Treecko helping by starting the campfire. But as May and Max work on washing everyone¹s dirty clothing; Ash, Taillow, Pikachu and Treecko settle down with their backs to the ocean, Ash telling them they have to learn to concentrate better by waiting for the waves. He tells them they lost to Brawly's Pokemon because they were attuned to the movement and flow of the waves, and if they in turn can get into flow with the motion as well, it'll help them they once again face Brawly's wave-attuned Fighting Pokemon. May watches the almost meditative technique and asks Max if this is Pokemon training, Max replying that Ash is being deadly serious. Max is also working with a Pokemon, but to do chores as he washes the clothes and places them on top of Forretress which then rises into the air and uses rapid spin to dry them.
The clothes fall into Max's hands and he thanks Forretress, while May - who has finished putting clothes up on the line - says that it looks more like Ash is just sitting there doing nothing. Brock - who is making rice balls while Torchic watches - explains Ash and his Pokemon are trying something a little different. Ash failed to defeat Brawly using power attacks, so now he and his Pokemon are going to try and learn patience and concentration.
A large wave approaches and Taillow squawks in alarm, but Ash tells it to wait, not just yet. Taillow settles back down and they wait for the approaching wave, trying to wait to dodge the wave when it is right against them, not yet, not yet, not.... NOW!
They rush away, but they've left it too late and the wave splashes over them and they all get soaked through. Ash makes sure his waterlogged Pokemon are okay, then tells them they'll get the hang of it, it may be weird to just sit and wait but it is going to help them immensely come fighting time.
Max and May ask Brock why Ash gets all the fun while they do cleaning and Brock does the cooking. Brock laughs and says, "Oh young ones, you will soon learn training isn't always about Pokemon."
With that kind of creepy line out of the way, Ash hangs up his jacket and hat and tries again. He and his Pokemon sit with their backs to the wave and wait, wait and wait and then they're up and running! Except Treecko still sits waiting and while Ash, Pikachu and Taillow get away, Treecko gets flooded by the wave.
Max decides to state the obvious and says Treecko waited too long, and a confused Ash proclaims what we've always known, he just doesn't get it! Ash is at a loss, they've been training for at least ten minutes now and they haven't gotten immediately better!
May tells him practice makes perfect and he should just keep trying.... and an angry Ash points out that Pokemon Contests aren't exactly easy either and she should be doing some training herself! Max points out that Ash has a good point and asks if she has any plans yet. Indeed she does, and she rushes by Brock as he carries in some hot tea and stands in the middle of the campsite, the centre of attention and loving it.
She explains that the most important part of a Pokemon Contest is looking good (no no! It's the part where the girls in swimsuits talk about world peace!) and entrances are the most important part of that. She has been having her Pokemon practise their entrances apparently, and she demonstrates this by doing a pirouette and then calling out Torchic and Wurmple.
Well these entrances might need a little bit more work, as Torchic begins running back and forth while Wurmple appears to be trying to lick its own ass! May shouts that they're doing it all wrong, they need to start with a somersault! She then tries to demonstrate this by spinning about on one leg clumsily, then stares up with embarrassment at the others as she realises how foolish she looks. She throws her arms behind her head and says that they're still working on it, and Max points out that you can't have two Pokemon enter at the same time. She looks shocked, then thrusts her chest out a little further, giggles and says she'll find a use for that entrance SOMEWHERE!
Will there be a pole involved?
Brock then lets her in on some inside knowledge, she shouldn't be dancing around like that! Max explains that a Pokemon Contest is about the Pokemon, not the Coordinator. She's aghast, she had her whole routine choreographed! She throws a hand onto her hip, cocks it jauntily and says she based the routine on Stephen's family... smooooth!
Ash agrees that Stephen's fighting technique would be great for a Contest (he's only seen Stephen use one Pokemon, which roared and used Hyperbeam! Hardly a strategy) but then all eyes are off the posing May and on the tent behind her, which is starting to shake and rattle. Yes the unexpected sentience of the tent is enough to drag three boys eyes of a posing young lady, and the tent - apparently tired of breathing everyone¹s stale farts - begins running away! The twerps cry out in shock and run to catch it, moving into the camera, May's boobs taking up the entire screen.
Well they would, wouldn't they.
The tent turns out not to be sentient after all, as it hits an obstacle and whatever was dragging it continues on, burrowing through the dirt towards the beach. Ash tells Pikachu to use Thunderbolt but Brock says that'll burn the tent to a crisp (the tent no longer attached to the thing in the ground?) so May has Wurmple use Stringshot. The Stringshot hits the displaced dirt and somehow this dirt appears to be connected to the Pokemon in the ground and it gets stopped in its tracks. Whatever it is tries to continue on pushing ahead, with Wurmple struggling to hold it in place. Treecko leaps forward and lands with Wurmple between its legs, then wraps its arms around the phallic looking Pokemon and pulls, which creates quite the dodgy image.
The twerps just stand and congratulate the Pokemon rather than helping, and soon Treecko and Wurmple begin to get dragged along the ground. The twerps finally rush to help and grab the string, then get hauled off of their feet and dragged around the beach before being pulled into the water.
The mystery Pokemon has escaped!
After dragging themselves out, the twerps are soaked and need to dry off their clothes. Thus we find shortly later a pantsless Ash with striped boxers exposed, wiping sand off of his jacket while Brock stares at the results of the dragged tent, his rice balls turned to slush balls. Max is dressed only in a singlet and his shorts and May appears to be naked, a pink towel wrapped around her as Brock sits with the tent over him and a suspicious bulge around where his crotch would be.
But while Brock appears to have noticed May's nudity, Ash is more concerned with the mysterious Pokemon. Ash thinks it might have been a Diglett that did the deed, but Brock's suspicion is that it was a Krabby. May doesn't care what it was, she just wants to keep away from it, but Ash has become intrigued by the bizarre hidden Pokemon and with support from Brock and Max he declares their training is now a quest to discover what the mysterious Pokemon is, much to May's chagrin.
Up on a cliff overlooking the beach, we find Team Rocket who managed to land in the opposite direction to which they were blasted! Meowth lies on his back, James is seated and Jesse is on all fours (HEY HEY!) asking what the hell happened. James complains that even if you mind your own business, you get blown away.
"If anything got blown, it's my back!" complains Meowth.
Haha, take that, Rocketshippers!
Wobbuffet pops out to salute and patiently declare its own name, and Jesse grabs her Pokeball to put it away, then notices displaced sand moving around down on the beach. Meowth fails to raise the possibility that Bugs Bunny is harassing them, instead theorising that it might be the same thing that blasted them off.
"Wow, big things do come in small packages," says Jesse.
Yeah sure, you ALL say that!
Jesse rushes off and when James and Meowth ask where she is going, she shouts back that she's off for revenge of course. She jumps over a rock and lands on something squishy, something big, something loud.
Loudred!
The mostly-mouth Pokemon leaps it its feet with a roar and then sucks in a massive lungful of air as Team Rocket quaver before it. Forcing the air out in a massive Gust, Team Rocket find themselves blasting off again while we're treated to our second completely unnecessary shot of a Loudred's asshole in as many episodes.
Charming.
That night, Ash, Brock and Max hide behind bushes with some Team Rocket-esque twigs and leaves held in their hands. They're waiting for the mysterious creature to reappear, while behind them sits their bedraggled, repaired tent which has been patched back together and pitched up again. The trio have left a plate of food out on the beach in the hopes of luring the mysterious Pokemon in. May sits behind them looking thoroughly bored, and complains that she's tired and wants to go to bed, but Ash is adamant they're going to capture the thing, declaring that this is great training. She asks how THIS could be training, and he replies that it is a great way to learn about concentration (though two of his Pokemon are sitting in their Pokeballs), sitting in the dark waiting for an enemy that could come from any direction. May moans that she wants to go to bed and Max mutters she should go into the tent and sleep then, but she refuses. When he asks why not she leaps forward and wraps her arms around his neck, shouting that she's scared to death! Suddenly Pikachu's ears prick up and Ash notices, asking what it is.
May strangles Max while looking about in fear, and Ash twists his head around, sweating as he tries to look everywhere at once and figure out where it is. Where it is, is behind them! The twerps turn just in time to be smashed by a tunnel of displaced sand that sends them flying into the air and crashing down into the beach. It charges the food and knocks it away, then charges at the twerps again who break off in all different directions. Since it is a monster and this is anime, it goes directly for the underage girl with the big boobs, and May runs screaming for it to get away while Ash calls on Pikachu to hit it with a Thunderbolt. Electricity strikes the sand and we see a brief shot of a spiked red carapace, then the sand and smoke clears and reveal a puckered opening in the sand, but the Pokemon itself is seemingly gone.
Ash asks Pikachu if it can sense it, but Pikachu can't hear, see or smell a thing. Ash begins to wonder just what the hell this thing is.
The sun rises and the twerps lie around or on the tent complaining about the brightness of the sun. May moans that she didn't get a wink of sleep and Ash tells her they said she could use the tent, but she was too scared to be in there by herself!
Jesus Brock, did you not at least TRY to suggest you could protect her? You're going to be a virgin forever.
May declares that enough is enough, she's finished with camping! She votes that they at the very least change spots since this one is so dangerous. Ash doesn¹t want to go though and Max agrees they have to find out what that thing is, and Brock points out that it DID go for the Pokemon food. Ash then notes that he was sure he saw something last night, something like a red horn when Pikachu hit it with the electric attack. He stands up and throws a fist high (emulated by Pikachu) and for some reason we see two Sandslash tussling as Ash quotes Professor Oak, "What happened before will happen once more!"
......
?
May is just as confused as the English Speaking world, and asks if he means, "If it's happened once, it'll happen twice". Max snaps at her that it is a line from a funny poem by Professor Oak, then brandishes what is apparently a poetry book with Oak's face on it. May smiles nervously at her little brother, realising perhaps not for the last time that her brother is a total geek.
Ash announces his new strategy, based on the knowledge that the mysterious Pokemon can dig through the sand. Forretress uses Rapid Spin to create massive holes in the beach and then the twerps cover them with leaves, Ash explaining they'll be used as pitfalls. Max points out that this is Team Rocket's type of deal and Ash proclaims that it works! Brock adds that after years of falling into holes, they're experts on them, which garners a grumpy reaction from Max and May.
"How low..." grunts Max.
"....can we go," finishes May.
"The shame," moans Brock and Ash as they and Pikachu turn their backs and hang their heads, black lines of despair tearing through the air above their heads.
That night Brock explains the Scooby Doo-esque plan. They've put out food and when the Pokemon starts eating, they'll put out more food and slowly guide it towards a pitfall. They wait through the night and May gets sleepy, yawning and muttering that nothing is happening before being shut up as the others hear something coming.
From the briny depths of the ocean come four seaweed coated monsters, denizens of the deep straight out of a 1970's Doctor Who episode. The monsters looks nothing like what the twerps saw last night, but when they spot the food they quickly begin eating, which Max says means they must be Pokemon. Brock plants more food and the second tallest "thing" sees the new food and leads the others towards the rock it is placed on.... and then fall into the hole.
Whatever the things are, they apparently can speak English and complaining that they can't believe THEY fell down a hole. The twerps walk up to the hole and look in, noting with confusion that they can understand them. At the sound of the voices, the two tallest seaweed monsters bolt upright and declare, "The Twerps!"
"The twerps?" asks Ash, as Brock realises to his horror what has happened.
"Prepare for trouble from the depths of the earth!" cries Jesse, throwing off the seaweed she was coated in.
"Make it double for all the trouble its worth!" adds James, doing the same.
"And they still insist on doing their motto," grunts Max.
"Pretty pathetic, eh?" sighs May.
"The shame!" cry Jesse, James, Meowth and Wobbuffet as they turn their backs and hang their heads, black lines of despair tearing through the air above their heads.
"The nerve!" growls Jesse, recovering.
"We're supposed to dig these holes, not fall into them!" yells James.
"We got out rights!" growls Meowth.
Unfortunately that's all we get to hear, as the sand displaces beneath their feet and Team Rocket are sent blasting off again!
Again!
AGAIN!
Whatever the mysterious Pokemon is, it begins scrambling up the side of the hole and Ash sees his chance. He calls for Pikachu to use Quick Attack, and it rushes in and smashes into the displaced sand, knocking free the mysterious Pokemon.... Corphish!
Yes, it is the same Pokemon that Ash almost caught while fishing a couple of days earlier (the same type of Pokemon, or the very SAME Pokemon? Hard to say since that was on another part of the island).
"Corphish, the Ruffian Pokemon," says Dextina, then changes her tune from last episode,"Corphish is exceptional in its ability to survive, it adapts to any environment, and will drive out any inhabitants and claim the territory for its own."
Brock exclaims and explains that Corphish was merely trying to mark its territory as it gets up, shakes it heads and glares at Pikachu. May thinks it is pretty annoying herself, but Ash knows it is tough and is interested in catching it. He has Pikachu tries Thunderbolt but Corphish avoids it and blasts Pikachu with Bubblebeam, then burrows into the sand and disappears. But it hasn't run away, oh no it comes up beneath Pikachu and punches the rodent hard, right in the nuts! Pikachu flies into the air, then comes back down with a glowing Iron Tail to strike down Corphish.... except it reaches up and catches Pikachu's tail with one Pincer, then uses the power and speed of the move to swing Pikachu away and go crashing crotch first right into Ash's face, knocking him over. Corphish then waggles a pincer provocatively while Ash tells Pikachu's butthole it deserves a rest.
That aside, Max is impressed by Corphish, as is Brock, while May wonders how Ash can possibly beat it. Ash though has learned his lessons from his defeat to Brawly, noting that Corphish cuts off attacks so taking the fight to it is pointless. He sends out Treecko which Max notes is a Grass Type not affected by Water Attacks. But Ash doesn't plan on fighting, telling Treecko to just wait for the right moment. Treecko closes its eyes and waits while Corphish stands glaring at it with insane, territorial rage. They wait and wait, not with the same majesty and strategic brilliance of Metapod Versus Metapod but instead in the patient stand-off between two armies as they wait for dawn. And dawn comes, the sun rising as Corphish gets more and more upset, one of its segmented legs tapping uncontrollably before it finally loses it and blasts a massive burst of Bubblebeam directly for Treecko.
Treecko reacts at last, flipping over so its Tail smashes into the Bubblebeam and cuts the attack off. Corphish is furious and charges, both pincers blowing bright with a Crabhammer attack, but Treecko intervenes with a Quick Attack with a Pound follow up that smashes Corphish through the air and down hard into the sand. Ash pulls loose a Pokeball and throws it, hitting Corphish and sucking it inside the ball which drops to the sand and wobbles and squeaks before finally settling to a stop and letting out a beep to let Ash know he has been successful.
Ash caught a Corphish!
Ash congratulates Treecko on an awesome job and Brock compliments him on his strategy, May asking what he means.
"You lose your cool, you lose your battle!" Brock proclaims by way of explanation.
"Oh! So Ash put his miserable loss at the Dewford Gym to good use!" says May happily.
"Ahhh" ahhh's Ash.
"That's right," agrees Max cheerfully, as Ash's ego is chipped away at some more, "Ash falls on his face and gets back up!"
But Ash's ego is nothing if not resilient (plus he isn't really bright enough for prolonged introspection) and he calls out Corphish, welcoming him to the team and offering a hand to shake. Corphish accepts its new life of servitude and cockfighting with surprising grace, putting out its pincer and shaking Ash's hand.... then getting a bit too overenthusiastic and ends up flipping him over and crashing into the sand.
Yes, Ash has caught a Corphish, but that might not mean an end to the problems Corphish has been causing the twerps.
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