285: All In A Days Wurmple
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But no, this is nothing as mundane as a kiddy fiddler or a flasher, but a Wurmple. The Pokemon drops to the ground and crawls off into the bushes. The twerps head back to May and ask her what is wrong, and she says the immortal words,"Something just popped out right in my face."
Oh, they must have stumbled onto a college campus.
The twerps look over at the bushes and spot the Wurmple, and Ash takes a look with Dextina learning, "Wurmple, the Worm Pokemon. Wurmple live primarily off sap from trees. The suction cups on its feet keep it from slipping."
May isn't too impressed at the sight of it, but when Brock and Max tell her that it evolves into a Beautifly she suddenly becomes much more interested and chases after it with the twerps close behind calling for her to wait up. Chasing ten year old girls through the forest? For Brock at least it's....
All In A Day's Wurmple
May calls for Wurmple amongst the forest as the others catch up, Brock is surprised May has a "thing" for a Wurmple but May explains she really wants a Beautifly like the Coordinator they recently helped win a contest, Janet. Ash - after being constantly exposed to May's gushing about how incredibly, orgasmically awesome contests are - asks May if she likes contests and she excitedly says - not for the first time - that she loves contests and wants to enter the next contest they come across and win a ribbon. Brock suggests they stop a little earlier than usual and he'll make them lunch, but May rushes off saying that while he's doing that, she's going to find and catch Wurmple. Surprisingly the only one with enough common sense to be concerned about a 10 year old girl running off into a strange forest by herself is Ash, but Brock says he is sure she'll be fine and Max points out that she'll be back the moment she gets hungry.
Watching all this from deeper in the forest is, of course, Team Rocket. Having overheard the conversation with their special binoculars that also make sounds appear louder and closer to the user, they've figured out they too can capture a Wurmple. Why? Because Jesse has been bit with the Contest bug too and she also wants to get herself a Beautifly. Meowth is more than happy to go along with the plan since he's eager to get back into the Boss' good graces and James, well James just does what he's told!
May is interrupted from her search by something shiny, or in this case a group of Bellossom that are standing in a circle moving slightly and repeating their names over and over again. This is apparently some kind of "dance" and May is hypnotised at the sight, which gives Team Rocket a bit of a head start and enables them to start looking for a Wurmple first. As Jesse hunkers down and begins looking amongst the bushes, James slaps a hand against a tree trunk and begins an odd kind of standing one armed push up.
"Building up dose biceps, big boy?" giggles Meowth almost... flirtatiously!
But James is just looking for hidden pressure points in case any Pokemon are hiding inside, and Jesse shows up and says they should be doing it "big" and does a flying kick on the tree, knocking a Weedle out of the tree. Impressed by her results, she smashes the tree with another kick and this time a Kakuna falls out. She continues kicking as James and Meowth comment on the oddness of first a Weedle and then a Kakuna falling out of the tree, why surely next would be.... BEEDRILL!
A swarm of Beedrill appear from out of the trees and Team Rocket legs it the hell out of there with the swarm close behind.
May is still looking at the Bellossom when she hears the commotion and turns to see Team Rocket charging at her with the Beedrill close behind.
"Get your twerpy self out of the way!" screams Jesse as they run by, May spotting the Beedrill and running along with Team Rocket, falling down a small hill Jesse ends up showing the pussy between her legs (Meowth, you sick freaks!) while the Beedrill fly mindlessly forward (till they'll hit some random innocent passer-by and FUCK THEIR SHIT UP) and May demands to know how she got tangled up in Team Rocket's troubles while James lies on all fours with his ass in the air.
As is his wont.
"Prepare for trouble now that we are united!" cries Jesse, leaping up to answer May's question.
"Make it double because you weren't invited!" adds James. And then May spots Wurmple and runs away, infuriating Jesse and James. Especially the latter, who shouts after her that they put their heart and soul into the motto every tim.... and he gets interrupted again, this time by Meowth who suggests they follow her and grab the Wurmple as well.
May - who has forgotten about Team Rocket - calls out Torchic to deal with the Wurmple, but then Jesse arrives on the scene and calls out Seviper, which gives Torchic a heart attack. May yells at Team Rocket for their interference, saying it is her Wurmple since she saw it first. Jesse retorts with confidence that actually the Wurmple is HERS since it is her right to catch anything that May wants.
Seviper tries Poison Tail but before it can connect, it is interrupted by Torchic's Peck Attack, infuriating James this time at May's interference with their interruption. He calls out Cacnea and tells it to use Pin Missile along with Seviper's Poison Tail on Torchic.... but then a Heracross comes THE FUCK OUT OF NOWHERE and saves the day!
A young kid with short cropped hair and fat face wearing a blue shirt under a yellow and green sweater arrives on the scene. He tells Team Rocket that a two on one attack is NOT fair and he is going to even the odds, and when Team Rocket try to beat on him with Seviper and Cacnea, Heracross uses Fury Attack to send Team Rocket blasting off again... already!
May thanks Fat-face McGee, then realises that Wurmple has disappeared! She gets upset, but Franklin - as he introduces himself - offers to help her find it.
Help himself into her panties more like!
Meanwhile Brock and Max prepare lunch while Ash and Pikachu work on Iron Tail, a move Pikachu picked up from Pokemon Coordinator Chaz but has failed to maintain so far. They practise on a nearby tree, with Pikachu charging, then leaping and flipping over as its tail glows white and... then fades out, causing Pikachu to bounce off of the tree. Ash tells it not to despair though, telling Pikachu to try again and try it does, the white glow of Iron Tail fading out again and causing Pikachu to collapse onto its fat little stomach. Out of nowhere arrives.... Franklin! He shows up now wearing a red shirt under his sweater instead of his blue one, and with May nowhere in sight!
He killed her and ate her!
He tells Ash he was impressed at the way Pikachu was bouncing itself off of that tree trunk, and introduces himself as Franklin and asks if he wants to battle.
Don't do it Ash, he'll kill and eat you!
Meanwhile, Franklin and May are....
Wha?
Okay, apparently we have twins here, except they're both named Franklin? And which is the evil twin (science has proven one of the twins will always be evil, and voiced by Jeremy Irons)? Is anybody going to get killed and eaten or are we going to be disappointed for the 290th time in a row?
Anyway, Franklin and May are climbing a cliffside in the hopes of finding one of those mountain-dwelling Wurmple. As May climbs she slips and Franklin takes the chance to mack on her, putting his arm around her, then sending her on ahead of him in order to get a better look at her ass before declaring that she's awesome and self sufficient and stuff, which causes her to blush.
Oh God he's going to kill her, skin her, put the skin on and then head down to the docks!
Meanwhile, Franklin (the other Franklin) tells Ash they'll be involved in a Double Battle, where both trainers use two Pokemon at the same time. Apparently it has been a long standing custom in Hoenn, and Max suggests that Ash take the chance to have a go at Double Battling since he might find himself facing a similar kind of battle in a Gym Match.
Franklin of the Red Shirt - let's call him Communist Franklin - calls out Ariados and Yanma while Ash sends in Pikachu and then Treecko. The match begins, Ariados firing a web at Pikachu and Treecko which both dodge it.... but then Yanma uses Sonic Boom and when Pikachu tries to dodge it gets hooked by a String Shot from Ariados. The Sonic Boom Attack zooms in considerably slower than the speed of sound and Treecko rushes to Pikachu's aid, pulling it free of the String Shot before the very, very slow Sonic Boom can hit them.
Communist Franklin continues with the double attack, having Yanma use Swift while Ariados uses Nightshade. Pikachu and Treecko both dodge the moves and Pikachu hits Yanma with a Thunderbolt, but then gets smashed by Nightshade from Ariados. Treecko comes to the rescue again, knocking Pikachu clear before charging at Yanma and Ariados which concentrate their dual attack on the tough little bastard. Treecko leaps clear of the attacks which combine and set off an explosion of dust, and then Pikachu leaps through the dust and attempts an Iron Tail at Ash's command. Max is concerned because Pikachu hasn't perfected the move yet, but for once Pikachu pulls it off perfectly and connects full on with Yanma, knocking it THE FUCK OUT!
Pleased as punch by this, Pikachu then attempts to capture lightning in a bottle and tries to use Iron Tail again, but this time the attack fades out and Ariados hits Pikachu hard with String Shot. Luckily though, this leaves it exposed to Treecko which uses its tail to smash Ariados with a Slam Attack and send it crashing into Yanma, ending the match and leaving Ash the winner!
Communist Franklin congratulates his experienced Double Pokemon Team for getting beaten by a novice team that had never fought together before with one member that couldn't quite yet use a new move properly, while Ash rightly congratulates Pikachu and Treecko for kicking some Communist ass. Communist Franklin congratulates Ash on his victory and then Brock kind of creeps the whole scene out by asking Franklin to stick around and take some of his special "Brock stew".
Oh Brock.
Meanwhile, Blue Franklin (let's call him... Blue Franklin!) can't figure out why they haven't found a Wurmple yet. May shows up with some berries and he compliments her on knowing how to take care of herself while she settles down and EATS FOOD OFF THE GROUND! Blue Franklin then out and out just asks if he can join her on their journey and she's a little taken aback, as most would be at such a forthright proposition (at least he didn't ask her if they could just skip the preliminaries and get straight to penis-in-vagina action) but luckily the awkward moment is saved when they spot Wurmple.
She calls out Torchic and has it use Tackle, crashing into the Wurmple and sending it tumbling. She then throws a Pokeball (a trifle early perhaps) and proclaims victory.... before Wurmple pops back out of the Pokeball looking a little miffed.
Perhaps even a trifle upset!
Wurmple uses Tackle, smacking its horned head right into TorchicÕs belly. Torchic squeals and Blue Franklin urges May to try Ember, since Wurmple are susceptible to fire attacks. Torchic fires Ember and Wurmple is knocked for a loop, and then May tries with a Pokeball again and this time.... THE BALL STAYS CLOSED!
May caught a Wurmple!
May holds the Pokeball up high in victory, but suddenly a metallic hand grabs it from her and they look up to see The Happy Buddha Face Meowth Balloon. It's Team Rocket!
Franklin is infuriated (he was hoping to cash in on May's exuberance to get a little summit-summit) and declares that they can't do that! Team Rocket just laugh, then proclaim their motto.
"Prepare for trouble we'll steal what we choose!"
"Make it double, we choose Wurmple... you lose!"
"To unite all peoples within our nation."
"To denounce the evils of truth and love."
"To extend our reach to the stars above."
"Jesse."
"James."
"Team Rocket flies cheap and steal at the speed of light,"
"Surrender to our criminal ways or prepare to fight!"
"Meowth! Dat's right!"
"WOBBUFFET!"
May demands they give the Pokeball back but they simply laugh at her, James clarifying the situation Jesse outline earlier to May. Anything that she catches, they steal!
Unfortunately for them, Franklin hasn't given up hopes of getting leg over just yet and he sends up Heracross, which hits the balloon and crashes it, sending May's Pokeball flying into her arms as she chases and catches it.
Team Rocket aren't giving up though, dammit they told her that she catches, THEY STEAL! Cacnea and Seviper are sent out to get the Wurmple back, using Pin Missile and Poison Tail respectively. Torchic fires Ember at the two attacking Pokemon, but they dodge it, then Seviper attempts a Poison Tail Attack on Heracross but is blocked before Blue Franklin tells May to use Wurmple. She calls it out of its Pokeball, but then realises.... she doesn't know any of its attacks!
Franklin suggests String Shot and she gives it a go, and Seviper (only a few episodes ago beating the shit out of EVERYTHING) and Cacnea find themselves wrapped up in gross tacky Wurmple fluid.
Ewwww.
With them trussed up they're sitting targets, and Torchic uses Ember before Heracross uses Megahorn, smacking Seviper and Cacnea into Team Rocket and sending them blasting off again while Franklin celebrates with May.
Yeah, Franklin would totally hit that.
Back at the camp, Communist Franklin is explaining that he has only just returned from a Pokemon Journey when May returns with Wurmple and... Franklin! Brock is confused, May is confused, Max is confused, Pikachu is confused, Ash doesn't get it (as always) and Franklin and Franklin explain, it is only their last name, their first being Forest and Forester.
They may or may not have a triplet called Forestest.
May confirms what we long suspected about her, she thinks identical twins are "fun". But Forest's encounter with his (possibly) evil twin brother seems to have knocked thoughts of knocking boots with May out of his head, as he explains that he has decided to leave the forest and go on a Pokemon Journey, with Forester agreeing that this means it is now his turn to stay in the forest and perhaps make clumsy come-ons towards ten year old girls.
Brock offers lunch to the twin brothers and May calls out Torchic and Wurmple to partake as well.... and Wurmple proceeds to eat all of the other Pokemon's food and then all the humans as well, including the still hot pot. Once done eating EVERYTHING it crawls up to May, rubs her leg, then curls up and falls asleep. Everyone looks down in surprise and May comments that it's a good thing it is so cute.
"Good looks can get you pretty far, take it from me!" says Brock, and everyone laughs and laughs and laughs and laughs at the eternally virginal Brock.
As a young man's self-esteem shatters inside, what of Team Rocket? Well we find Jesse and James hanging off a branch sticking out of a cliff, Meowth hugging the trunk as they argue over exactly whose fault this sticky situation is. As the sun sets, they notice a Wurmple at the far end of the limb and Jesse grabs the opportunity by throwing a Pokeball and, wonder of wonders.... catches a Wurmple!
She crawls along the branch happily and grabs the Pokeball, and to share in her joy Wobbuffet proudly pops out of its own Pokeball and happily declaring its own name. This of course shatters the limb and before we know it, Team Rocket are.... well, you get the picture.
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