ENGLISH NAME	JAPANESE NAME	POKEMOPOLIS NAME	DODGINESS RATING	ANIMATION	STORY	TEAM ROCKET	MORAL LEARNT
534: Pokémon Ranger and the Kidnapped Riolu! Part One	539: Pokémon Renja! Hado no Rioru!! Zenpen	Ranger Extraneous Part 1			The twerps try to save a special Riolu from Pokémon Hunter J	Way out of their evil league	It's okay to enslave Pokémon to your will if you're a good guy!

At night in a forest, Pokémon sleep under the moon while at a nearby imposing looking building, an explosion sets off an alarm. Two men in security themed uniforms, a Golem and a Riolu rush to the entrance which explodes open for them. They're being chased by a scientist and REAL security guards, and the scientist warns that Riolu (RX1) is a priceless research specimen and demands it back, but Golem blasts at them and they escape to a truck, recalling Golem and hiding Riolu in the back before booking the hell out of there. In the back, Riolu settles down to meditate, but then comes to attention as it hears the man waiting in the front of the truck gloating that Riolu BELONGS to him now, while the guards laugh that Riolu believed their lies that they were trying to help it.

Realising it has been fooled; it blasts the back of the truck open and leaps out, clutching at an injured arm before rushing into the forest. As the kidnappers rush after it (despite not seeing which way it went), the man in the dark suit wearing sunglasses in the middle of the night gloats on, impressed with Riolu's power.... and what he can do with it!



An unspecified time later (presumably the next day) the twerps are moving through the forest when Ash suddenly feels a flash of aura ride over him. The others ask if something is wrong and he.... says no for some reason, and then they spot Riolu come staggering out of the bushes. Ash moves up to ask if it is okay, but when he tells the grumpy looking Riolu that he wants to help, it blasts him backwards with Aura Sphere. Brock is amazed; usually Riolu doesn't learn Aura Sphere until it evolves into Lucario! Ash again tells it that he is trying to help and it blasts another Aura Sphere at him, but a slightly older kid leaps out of the bushes and slaps the sphere away. He checks on the twerps, allowing Riolu to escape, then insists that he'll take care of this and then runs after it.

The twerps, fears assuaged by the stranger who told them he'll handle things, agree all is well and continue on to the next town, where they spend an uneventful night. Team Rocket, who are following the twerps, agree that Riolu is obviously more than they can handle so also continue on their own way, and no one ever discovers the mystery of the Riolu.

And that is one of several reasons why I don't have an eleven year old highly successful global franchise!

Ash, of course, chases after the stranger, and Team Rocket agree that they'll capture Riolu themselves. Ash moves through the bushes but is hauled into one by the oddly old sounding youth who whispers harshly that he told them he'd handle this. Ash tries to speak but he shushes him, pointing up into the tree where Riolu is meditating. Dawn and Brock catch up and ask if the Riolu belongs to the kid, and he tells them it isn't his and it isn't a wild Pokémon either, it just wants to get home. Before he can explain where home is, though, familiar looking trucks burst through the bushes, the twerps recognising them as belonging to Pokémon Hunter J's thugs. They leap out and knock Riolu from the tree with a Crobat, but when Ash tries to attack them with Pikachu, Riolu comes out of the bushes pissed at EVERYONE and blasts Aura Spheres all over the place, including at Ash! When the smoke clears though, the thugs are smirking; Riolu's display of power just makes them want it more. They all call out Crobats and Ash tries again to add his support to Riolu, but the young man jumps his ass in front of Ash's face and whips off his coat to reveal....



Terrible, terrible clothes!

Yes amazingly this guy following the kidnapped Riolu in the episode titled Pokémon Ranger and the Kidnapped Riolu (Part 1!) turns out to be.... a Pokémon Ranger! He uses his Capture Device to dominate and enslave the mind of a nearby Ariados that has just been hanging out checking out all this crazy shit going down. With the freedom loving wild Pokémon enthralled to his will without its consent, he teaches those mean ol' hunters who want to capture Pokémon without their consent a lesson! Stringshot wraps up the Crobats, and then he enslaves a nearby Nincada and has it dig underneath the hunters (who are just hanging out watching all this dramatic flourishing) and trap them in a pit. Brock tells the others that this kid isn't just any Ranger but a TOP Ranger with a special kind of Capture Device that apparently is better than usual at using Pokémon like tools and then discarding them without thought or feeling.

He shows Riolu a small wood carving of a Riolu, catching it by surprise, then puts the bag with the carving around its neck and picks it up in his arms, telling the twerps to follow him. They set off, the Ranger introducing himself as Kellyn, and they set off as the Hunters demand to be let out and Team Rocket hide out in the bushes trying to figure out what is going on.... at least James and Meowth are, Jesse is more interesting in humbling that "hussy" Pokémon Hunter J!

The twerps treat Riolu's arm and then it rushes off to the bank of the stream to settle down and look at the carving, freaking out Ash who gets a sudden rush of memory from Riolu's aura, including the old man who gave the carving to Riolu originally. When Ash tells Riolu this, Dawn is amazed, she was unaware that Ash could do that. Ash doesn't get what the big deal is, he's completely nonplussed about the insanely crazy shit he's done and seen in his life he just wants to cockfight his Pokémon. Kellyn is impressed, and he suggests Ash and Riolu's auras are a match.

Shows what he knows, Ash's aura is only identical to some magician dude from thousands of years ago!

Kellyn gets a call on his wrist gauntlet/capture device, it's Salona, who instantly recognizes Ash, much to Dawn's further amazement, he knows a real life Ranger? A GIRL ranger!?! With cool clothes!

More importantly to Brock though, is the "girl" part.

He begs to know if she remembers him and she laughs that of course she does and asks if he still means to be a breeder (snicker) causing some inappropriate comments that end with Croagunk coming out to settle things down. Salona is riding in the sidecar of a police bike driven by Officer Jenny, and they're following up some leads on Pokémon Hunter J's clients. Kellyn tells her they're heading for the rendezvous, but then a sound like thunder catches their attention.... it's J's Airship!



Goddamn!

J is receiving a report from the leader of her thugs about the "Top Ranger" who stopped them, with friends! She sees a picture of the twerps and growls as she recognises those meddling kids, and is furious that THIS is the Thug's excuse, and cuts off his attempts to explain.

Meanwhile, Kellyn and the twerps are being pulled by Buizel and Piplup on a small rowboat up a river. Kellyn is explaining that this is "Paradise Kingdom" and Riolu is the "Inheritor of the Aura", one of a long line of generations tasked with using its Aura to protect the Kingdom. Riolu was kidnapped by one group planning to use Riolu for their own evil purposes, then re-kidnapped by ANOTHER group intending to use it for their own evil purposes, but somehow Riolu escaped. Ash is infuriated at the idea of a group of people who use Pokémon purely for their own needs without thought for the feelings of that Pokémon, not like good people like Kellyn who.... well...... it's different because he enslaves and uses them and then tosses them away for GOOD reasons!

Suddenly, paedophiles!



Well okay, not quite, but they come up from underneath Dawn's skirt anyway, knocking the twerps into the water and leaving Kellyn and Riolu in the remains of the boat. The Sharpedo belong to J's Hunters, who send them after the twerps as Kellyn enslaves a Floatzel that thought a thrashing, enraged pack of Sharpedo was a pretty cool place to hang around. They try to swim away using their Pokémon, but the Sharpedo charge, Ash taking a chance as they leap out of the water to blast them with Thunderbolt. But as they try to pull clear, a massive blast of Hyperbeam smashes into the water before them, and as the steam clears....



J has arrived!

Pikachu and Piplup try to blast her out of the sky but Salamence smashes through their attacks with Hyperbeam, so Kellyn has Floatzel use Water Gun and for whatever reason she doesn't block this. Salamence is winged and knocked to the side, the shot from her wrist cannon knocking loose the bag around Riolu's neck. It starts floating downstream, and Riolu lets go of Floatzel and chases after. Kellyn and the twerps try to chase it, Salamence blasts rocks into the water in an attempt to stop them, but Ash and Buizel make it through, chased by J as Kellyn, Brock and Dawn are left behind.

Riolu goes over a waterfall trying to get to the carving, sinking into the water as it loses control. Buizel dives underwater after it as it sinks deeper, fading into the memory of its training back in its old home as the breeder who cared for it carved the Riolu piece for him. As he gave it the carving, a car had arrived with a scientist, two guards and a Drowzee and they'd demanded Riolu, then attacked the old man as he pushed Riolu to safety.

Riolu wakes up and finds itself out of the water with Ash, Buizel and Pikachu. It's panicky until Ash gives it the carving back, suggesting that he once again shared its aura and saw its memories of its home kingdom.

Pikachu hears a noise, and not far off the hunters are reporting to J that there was no sign of Riolu downstream. They hear a rustling and then spot Ash, Buizel, Pikachu and Riolu rushing away, but as they go to give chase, J stops them. She has a plan.... an evil plan!

Team Rocket, meanwhile, just have a stupid one.

Their plan is LITERALLY to dig a pit, somehow J will fall into it (she's on a flying Pokémon!) and then they will jump in and... presumably beat the shit out of her? As plans go it is a stupid one, though remarkably straightforward for Team Rocket. James seems less than convinced of the quality of Jesse's strategy, but she's convinced though, and fantasises pleasurably about destroying something beautiful. J, meanwhile, is putting her own plan to do the same into action, as a wildfire suddenly shoots up all around Team Rocket!

As they panic in terror, Jesse suddenly realises they can.... hide in the pit! They leap in, cheering that they're out of the soup, while high above them J has her Salamence lay waste TO THE ENTIRE FUCKING FOREST in order to capture one small little fox raccoon thing. Spotting Ash, she brings her Salamence down just above them, ordering that he hand Riolu over. He insists that she'll have to get through him first, and after a moment of staring at this incredibly stupid little boy, she mutters in boredom for Salamence to blast them. As they attempt to leap clear and the forest burns all around them, things are looking grim, can Ash rescue Riolu? Will J be thwarted? Will good triumph over evil in the end?



Well, yes, of course, but part of the fun is seeing how it happens! See you next episode!

BEST QUOTES

"That Hunter hussy!"

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