422: May's Egg-Cellent Adventure
Dodgy Synopsis
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426: Sodateyasan to Pokémon no Tamago!
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What indeed, Gentle Dodgers? Let's find out about what will be.....
A young girl in old overalls and a terrible hairdo pokes out and demands to know what May is doing? The Voltorb only attack trespassers and that is what SHE is doing. May is shocked to discover she is trespassing (gypsies don't believe in property boundaries, anyway!) but the accusing girl suddenly forgets her fury as her windburnt, freckled face crinkles in recognition and she cries out with adulation (and perhaps love?) that she knows who May is!
Apparently the girl - Nicolette - recognises May as a Pokémon Contest winner, just like she herself wants to be. They're interrupted by a fat man and his thin wife (romantic evenings must be interesting) who introduce themselves as Christopher and Jeannie - Nicolette's parents.
Inside introductions appear to have been made as Christopher and Jeannie comment on Ash and May's respective goals to win at the Battle Frontier and become a Top Coordinator. They tell the twerps that both he and Jeannie would like Nicolette to bog off and leave the farm, but she is too much of a homebody to want to go - luckily the girl in question is not in the room to hear her parents say how they wish she'd get the fuck out of there at the tender age of 10.
Max asks what kind of farm this is and Christopher explains that they run an egg farm, looking after Pokémon eggs for trainers as well as raising their own. Ash lords it up over May and Max with his superior knowledge of such things (hey he might as well, it's a once in a lifetime event) and May asks if they can see a Pokémon Egg since apparently despite having a top Gym leader for a father they've never seen one before.
Apparently the "Grand Tour" takes place off-screen however, as the next thing we see is Max sitting out in the grass grooming Munchlax (in what looks a disturbing scene). Nicolette spots him while doing her farm duties (cleaning up poop and being uneducated) and rushes up to tell the tiny little boy that she might not be able to deal with the likes of May, but she probably has what it takes to beat him..... only it turns out she was only THINKING this and has no idea that she "thinks out loud" and actually just straight up told Max to his face that she's scared (and aroused) by his sister and wants to beat on him to make her feel better about herself.
Oh my, life on the farm, Gentle Dodgers.
Max points out that Munchlax doesn't actually belong to him but May, and then May herself arrives and mentions that Nicolette's parents told her all about her desire to be a Coordinator. Nicolette is horrified anew to hear her private dreams bandied about so casually, and turns around May's suggestion that she enter a Pokémon Contest by challenging May to a battle with Munchlax. May is shocked, Munchlax isn't exactly an experienced battler, but before she can calm Nicolette down the girl has called out her Vileplume and is launching attacks at Munchlax, hitting the unsuspecting Pokémon with Petal Dance!
Munchlax staggers about in a daze and lifts its fingers up in confusion, using Metronome to..... flail about on the ground, perhaps using Splash or the like. The over-excited Nicolette is too close to orgasm to stop and orders Vileplume use Stun Spore to blast Munchlax and left it even more dazed than before, while May continues to freak out since her Munchlax has still never been in a battle. Nicolette goes for climax by having Vileplume blast the fuck out of Munchlax with Bullet Seed, then laughs that May isn't so hot after all.
May is PISSED, nobody tells the Jailbait Gypsy Princess she isn't hot, and she insists to Max that all Munchlax needs is a little focus... and it takes her literally and uses Focus Punch to..... PUNCH VILEPLUME RIGHT IN THE FUCKING FACE!
Vileplume is sent flying while Max has to wearily explain to May what just happened. She has Munchlax finish Vileplume off with a Solar Beam that mostly misses but still does enough damage just from a glancing blow to knock it out. Nicolette recalls Vileplume as May calms down at last and apologises for letting it get so out of hand. A clearly shaken Nicolette tells her not to worry about it, but it is clear that she now believes there is no way she can ever be a Pokémon Coordinator, she'll just stay on the farm forever and her parents can keep buying her food!
Ash and Brock call them over to join Christopher to finally get around to the Grand Tour we assumed happened earlier. They enter the big silos and find shelf after shelf of eggs, both from trainers and the farms own Pokémon Eggs. Christopher asks May if she'd mind sharing some stories with Nicolette of her time on the road, and she says she'd be happy to.
Meanwhile Team Rocket have been watching the farm with great interest, deciding to take the opportunity to steal all of the eggs and give them to the Boss. But they need a plan first, and James thinks he has a fool proof one!
Well this can't possibly end badly, surely.
That night the twerps thank Jeannie for the nice meal and she and Christopher again push May to share some stories with Nicolette. The wild-haired girl says no thanks though and heads off, her parents insisting to the twerps that she DOES want to go out on her own into the world and stop being a financial burden on them, seriously.
Just then a large electric blast goes off in the distance, indicating the Voltorb have attacked something. They all rush to the border and find a large egg with a suspiciously "R" looking symbol on it, and a letter that asks them to look after the egg until the "mother" returns.
Given the size of the egg, she's probably gone to go buy some seriously strong methamphetamines.
They carry the egg off, watched by a laughing Jesse and James from the bushes, though by the looks of things they didn't quite get clear of the Voltorb's attack. Their brains may be frazzled but they're still able to whip out a remarkable number of egg-related puns as Wobbuffet happily salutes in agreement and Mime Jr. mimics them.
"There's nothing like a good plan to keep your sunny side up now is there," adds James.
"And soon we'll be egging the Boss on to give us a big raise!"
chirps Jesse happily, turning to face James as they both enjoy their terrible wordplay.
"No more rambling, no more scrambling!" they sing and dance together,"Get. the. yolk!?!"
But wait, all these puns.... and no Meowth?
The egg is settled in while Christopher and Jeannie show the twerps one of the other stored eggs which appears to be close to hatching. They ask the twerps to guard the eggs for them after they offer to help, and May finds Nicolette rubbing an egg with a towel and grabs one and begins sawing her arms over it, and Nicolette gasps at her to use gentler strokes to avoid making the gooey stuff come out.
As the two compare their lives and Nicolette blushes over her desire to leave the farm and go on a journey working against her fright of leaving the safety of the farm and the financial security of leeching off of her parents. May tells her that everyone is scared to begin with, hell she didn't even LIKE Pokémon when she first started. But now she's a successful Coordinator and going for Top Coordinator at the Grand Festival. Nicolette considers it for a moment, but finally tells May that she just doesn't have the confidence to do it.
Meanwhile, Team Rocket float over the farm in their Happy Buddha Face Meowth Balloon (why didn't they just use THIS to get past the Voltorb?) while Jesse makes contact with whatever is hidden inside the giant egg. What is it? It is.... horror made manifest! Yes, we're getting to see a "darker" side of Meowth before the egg transforms into a kind of egg-robot that Dr Robotnik would be proud of.
The Eggbot grabs multiple eggs and pops them into egg trays it stores on its back as it heads off back towards the edge of the farm to make a getaway. As Meowth goes though, he notices the glowing egg being specifically looked after by Christopher and Jeannie. Meowth smashes through the window and grabs it then takes off, the twerps rushing in and being told by Christopher and Jeannie what is happening (a giant egg stole some little eggs!).
The Voltorbs attempt to attack the egg but are blasted into unconsciousness by the Eggbot, and Meowth cackles with delight causing Nicolette to gasp that the egg is laughing. A perfect time to cue the motto, complete with the R represented by a dramatically flaming R AND a dramatically flaming James!
"Prepare for trouble see the egg thinks you're funny!""But I think your yolks are runny!"
"An evil as old as the galaxy!"
"Sent here to fulfil our destiny!"
"Mime-mime, miiiime!" agrees Mime Jr., filling in for Meowth.
"To denounce the evils of truth and love!"
"To extend our reach to the stars above!"
"Jesse!"
"And James!"
"Miiiime mime, Mime!"
"Whenever there's peace in the universe!"
"Team Rocket!"
"Is dere!" adds Meowth from the Eggbot.
"To make everything worse!" they finish together.
"WOBBBBBB-UFFET!"
"MIME!"
Dropping a suction cup down onto the Eggbot to haul it up, Team Rocket are delighted with the success (so far!) of their plan, while Jeannie and Christopher just want to know who they are and why they want their eggs.
"Prepare for trouble, that's an eggcellent question!" proclaims Jesse, falling straight back into motto mode.
"But we're not going where we've already been!" finishes James, cutting off the motto before he and a mimicking Mime Jr. demand to know how dumb they think they are.... and Jesse angrily snaps at them not to answer that before demanding that the "twerp with the head handkerchief" explain who they are.
As May panics at the unexpected spotlight and struggles to explain (Max having to fill in), Nicolette notices the egg that is close to hatching. Ash tells Pikachu to use Thunderbolt but Nicolette prevents him in case he hurts the eggs. The Eggbot dances happily to mock them while Ash and Pikachu are left impotent like Brock.... but May has an idea how to deal with that (not Brock's impotence) and has Vileplume use Stun Spore and then Petal Dance, confusing Team Rocket inside of the balloon and then blasting them about. The eggs are thrown free and the twerps catch the trays, but the glowing egg falls by itself, and so May, rather than run and catch it, poses then throws out Munchlax which drops onto its back and bounces the egg off of its belly and lets Jeannie catch it.
Team Rocket angrily demand the eggs they rightfully stole back, but with the eggs safe, the Twerps are free to attack with better moves! Vileplume uses Bullet Seed to fight off the Eggbot's encroaching arms, then Vileplume and Munchlax use Solarbeam (during the night!?!) to blast away the balloon.... but the robot and its attachment to the basket is left! Team Rocket make a run for it and Ash screams for Pikachu to use Quick Attack to prevent them escaping (why not just use Thunderbolt?) and the fat little rodent starts running, going fast, then faster.... then REALLY fast as it suddenly explodes with energy and scorches through the ground and then BLAM!
HOLY CRAP!
Needless to say the damage sends Team Rocket blasting off again, while Ash is left shocked... what the hell was that!?! It sure as hell wasn't a Quick Attack, and Brock tells him with some surprise that Pikachu appears to have learnt - just randomly - Volt Tackle!
The sun appears to have risen sometime randomly in the next few seconds, and they all gather around the egg as it glows and glows and then finally "hatches" to reveal... Vulpix!
Oh God not that squealing brat!
May congratulates Nicolette, telling her she did great with her earlier combinations. Nicolette decides right there and then that she WILL leave home and become a Pokémon Coordinator, much to the delight of her parents and especially Jeannie, who has now freed up enough food to finally become just as fat as Christopher!
By way of saying thanks to May for convincing their 10 year daughter to fuck off out alone into the big wide world to sink or swim, they have Nicolette offer May an egg inside of a jar....
NO!
....she gasps that she doesn't know.... should she take it?
NO!
The other twerps encourage her though, saying there is no reason why she shouldn't take it....
NOOO!
....and so May decides to do so, and takes the egg off of their hands.
Oh God, oh no! What's the problem, Gentle Dodgers? We have one word for you....
TOGEPI!
Please God/Allah/Vishnu/Doctor Who, don't let it be happening again!
| BEST QUOTES |
 "What was that?" ".....uhh.... Focus Punch....""Wow! That means Munchlax knows how to use Focus Punch!"
 "We'll use my foolproof plan!" "So spill da beans, fool!"
"How dumb do you think we are?" "And don't answer that!"
"You're giving me a pain but I can't say where coz kids watch dis show!"
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