412: Hail to the Chef
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414: Nyura to Bariyado! Focchino Resutoran!?
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Meanwhile, Team Rocket are also tired, trudging unhappily through the same forest complaining of hungry. But then they spot a restaurant sitting unreasonably in the middle of the goddamn forest, and James and Meowth charge for the front door till Jesse pulls them up by reminding them that they don't have any money. James and Meowth run face first into the door as they look back at her miserably, and fall through inside where a young lady named Rhoda in an odd variation on a maid/waitress outfit greets them and tells that that as the restaurant is opening for the first time, all food is free!
Well then, in that case Team Rocket say....
Munchlax points out a restaurant in the middle of the forest to the twerps... a different restaurant! May is embarrassed when her gut rumbles just like Ash's and admits she is hungry, and the doors open to reveal a young lady named Rhonda and her chef - Mr. Mime!
Yeah that's who you want cooking your food - a terrifying clown.
Rhonda tells them that Mr. Mime doesn't just make the food, he puts on a show as well.... but the only show Brock wants to see is show him dem titties! Appearing on bended knee before a startled Rhonda (wearing a far more demure traditional waitress style dress than Rhoda at the other restaurant) he asks if he can show HER a romantic candlelit dinner... and Max stomps up and drags him physically out of his illusion by the chair.
Meanwhile, as Mr. Mime and Rhonda excitedly prepare to serve their customers - at the other restaurant the Sneasel Chef is looking pissed off as it waits for Rhoda to take Team Rocket's orders. She's busy making small talk though, asking if they're heading to Saffron for the Pokémon Contest since they have a Pokémon with them. Meowth informs her that he isn't interested in taking part in contests and Rhoda darts backwards against a wall in horror at the shock of a talking cat.
That's right, goddammit, people need to remember that Meowth is a strange and unusual Pokémon!
Team Rocket for some reason don't show off this fact but insist it was just the grumbling of their stomachs, and then Jesse goes over all girl as she appears in a large red dress proclaiming she is Jesse the Pokémon Coordinator. This draws Rhoda back from the wall to the table in delight, she can't believe she has a coordinator in her restaurant - and then remembers she hasn't actually brought them menus yet! She rushes away as Sneasel cackles, and Team Rocket notice it for the first time and can't help but be slightly put off - after all, would you want a cat handling your food?
Well, Meowth really doesn't seem too bothered or impressed, and laughs off Jesse's suggestion that he learn a skill, claiming that intellectual types like him don't need that. She slams his face violently into the table and tells him to THINK about being useful. Sneasel laughs and tells him that serves him right and it's a waste of time to feed a Meowth good quality food. Jesse and James both have a giggle about this and Meowth snaps angrily at the "overgrown fry cook" which gets back in his face, while Jesse gasps that it has a wonderful feisty attitude and she wishes they had a Sneasel like that on their team. Meowth is horrified - visualised by teetering on the edge of a pillar of rock over crashing waves - but then Rhoda returns with the menus, angrily demanding that Sneasel apologise for insulting their customers.
Grumpily it does so while Rhoda further apologises, promising them that the food will more than make up for it. Jesse and James are more than happy to go along with this but Meowth can't take it and grumps that he'll believe it when he tastes it. Sneasel can't resist having another go at it drives Meowth batshit again and they prepare to throw down until Rhoda demands Sneasel get back to cooking and James physically restrains Meowth, whispering to him that he can get in a fight with the cook AFTER they've eaten!
Meanwhile the twerps are waiting impatiently for their meal as Mr. Mime hides behind a curtain. Finally it opens to reveal Mime standing in front of what looks like a FAKE kitchen backdrop. Using Psychic, it lifts the utensils and cookware and vegetables and has them cut up and put on the burner and seasoned and mixed together all without laying a hand on them.
Well... it's hygenic I guess!
Rhonda explains that even the food preparation itself is all about the presentation, and a lust-hungry Brock agrees eagerly before reaching out to take the hand of the woman he loves.... and accidentally ends up on Dateline's To Catch a Predator instead!
While all the overcomplicated presentation goes on, Team Rocket are disappointed by the final presentation of their own meal - a horribly showcased burger patty with some ketchup on it! But after taking a reluctant bite, Jesse and James become wildly enthusiastic and scoff everything down, raving about the taste. Meowth tries a bite of his and finds it bland, but Jesse and James continue to cry out in delight over the taste, getting meatballs next that appear to make James physically orgasm (so he likes balls in the mouth?). Meowth figures he must be missing something and tries the meatballs prepared for him and..... explodes out of his chair and rockets around the room - yes Gentle Dodgers, you are watching a small cat propelled around the room by an explosively hot, never-ending fart.
Gulping down a huge glass of water, Meowth can't understand why Jesse and James are enjoying their meal so much.... until he finally suspects and grabs a bite of Jesse's meatball (infuriating her) and cries out in delight as he farts out a column of pleasure (never thought I'd write that!) before casting an accusing paw at Sneasel - it deliberately gave him and only him bad food!
Meanwhile, the twerps are delighting in the amazingly presented food of Mr. Mime, which looks more delicious than anything they've ever seen (can you guess where this is going, Gentle Dodgers?) and even includes a small ice sculpture of Mr. Mime itself in the middle. Happily they all grab a bite and.....
A restaurant owner's nightmare come to life.
Brock takes Rhonda's hand to whisper that if he doesn't make it he wants her to know he loves her. Ash staggers back to his feet as Rhonda whines that she knows the food is horrible and no "silly" presentation can change that. Just then the wall explodes (as walls will) and Meowth comes tumbling through, chased by Sneasel as the two try to throw down on each other and we learn the two restaurants are actually back to back and the twerps and Team Rocket were on a collision course till they encountered their respective restaurants.
Brock is surprised, claiming he is seeing double - two Rhondas! - only to learn that Rhoda and Rhonda are twin sisters and don't like each other very much. Rhonda accuses Rhoda of starting a fight in her restaurant and Rhoda snaps back that it is the fault of the Pokémon, not her. She then notices the complicated presentation of the food and smugly mocks her sister for being over-reliant on how everything looks instead of focusing on the taste like their daddy taught them.
Daddy must have been fat.
Rhonda retorts that if Rhoda spent some time making her food actually look good then she wouldn't have to give it away to get people to eat it, while the twerps and Team Rocket spot each other and immediately get suspicious and angry of the other's motives.
Rhonda and Rhoda get furious as they share insults, and Rhoda demands a contest the next day where the best food wins.... and Rhonda agrees so long as presentation also plays a part because their Dad ALSO said that food should look good. Rhoda reluctantly accepts, and Meowth offers to judge (delighted with the idea of naming Sneasel the loser no matter what!) and Ash, May and Max also all speak up (Brock doesn't say a word, haha!). Rhonda and Rhoda agree they can be judges and Brock proclaims that whoever wins will have no bearing on which one he chooses to love, while Jesse and James just stand there looking confused... they didn't even get a patented Crazy Meowth Giovanni Fantasy to explain why they should do this!
HEY TRAINERS, WHICH OF THESE POKEMON IS NOT A FLYING TYPE!?! SWELLOW, DUSTOX OR MASQUERAIN!?! THE ANSWER IS DUSTOX AND IF YOU CHOSE SWELLOW THEN YOU GOT SOME SERIOUS FUCKING ISSUES, KID!
That night a full moon (it's ALWAYS a full moon) shines down over the two restaurants as Jesse and James are surprised to be asked by Rhoda to coach Sneasel - it has no sense of presentation and appeal and surely Jesse does since she is a Pokémon Coordinator! Jesse agrees happily, declaring she will bring the style that has won her countless Pokémon Contests, and shuts up an appalled James by telling him to play along till they can steal Sneasel, Mr. Mime AND Pikachu.
In the other restaurant, Rhonda asks Brock to give Mr. Mime cooking lessons since she somehow knows he has talent at making food (or maybe guesses that as the only semi-adult amongst a group of children he MUST be a cook). May asks why Rhonda and Rhoda don't just run a restaurant TOGETHER but Rhonda explains that Rhoda always treats her like a child and this causes arguments between them and nothing gets done. Brock agrees to help, but only because he wants the two sisters to make out.... make up! He wants them to make up!
Also to have sex with each other while he watches and eventually joins in.
Soon we see Mime being taken through the process of cooking, stopping it from psychically just tossing in a bunch of spices willy-nilly and explaining to it that spices must be added that will enhance and bring out flavour - a concept that Mr. Mime has apparently honestly never considered.
In the next restaurant, Jesse instructs Sneasel to use Fury Swipes on a huge block of ice they just happened to have around to create an ice sculpture. It slices away and creates a crude but serviceable sculpture of a Sneasel..... but so tiny that Team Rocket have to view it through a microscope, delighting Meowth who thinks there is no chance it can win.
Next, Jesse throws a variety of costumes on a miserable looking Sneasel, a process that apparently goes on late into the night until Jesse and James become exhausted and fall asleep - Jesse splayed out over the top of an absolutely miserable looking James, thus proving that even if she was the one pegging him a relationship would never work between the two of them!
As they sleep, though, Sneasel practises cutting up carrots, seemingly fascinated with the process from an entirely new outlook - not worrying about simply taste but presentation as well. In the other restaurant, Mr. Mime continues to work with Brock to improve the taste of the food it makes.
The next day, the contest begins, Brock snapping at a surprised Meowth that Judges need to be impartial after he shouts out for Mr. Mime to win it. But as Mr. Mime begins its traditional dynamic presentation, Sneasel surprises everyone by putting on some flourish of its own. A concerned Rhonda tells Mr. Mime to step things up so it uses Psychic to lift up the spices... then remembers Brock's words and lowers them back down and begins working by hand to prepare the food, tasting it as it cooks in order to get a sense of the taste.
Finally both meals are completed and Sneasel's actually looks presentable for a change, but before the meals can be tasted whips wrap around Sneasel, Mr. Mime and Pikachu and haul them into cages - Team Rocket are jumping the gun and ruining any chance of success!
"Prepare for trouble you wannabe gourmets!""Make it double... like cheese soufflés!"
"An evil as old as the galaxy!"
"Sent here to fulfil our destinies!"
And then they wait as Meowth just stares..... till Jesse snaps that it's his line and uses the whip to haul him over, James whispering harshly that he BEGGED them for the extra line in the new motto! He mumbles that he doesn't want to help them capture Sneasel since they'll replace it, an idea that seems to catch them totally by surprise, how could he think that!?! With that assurance, Meowth is back on board, and the motto can continue!
"DEN I'M MEOWTH! AND I'M BAD TO DAH BONE!"
"To denounce the evils of truth and love."
"To extend our reach to the stars above."
"Jesse."
"And James."
"And Meowth is my name!"
"Anywhere there's peace in the universe!" proclaims Jesse.
"Team Rocket!" adds James.
"Will be dere!" throws in Meowth.
"To make everything worse!" they all finish together as they circle about on the bizarre choice of a 3D plate (with Meowth faces around the edge!) with a meal of R-Shaped meat and vegetables with a white sauce.
"WOBBUFFET!" agrees Wobbuffet, who apparently enjoys the idea of needless 3d background imagery.
"CHIIIIME!" adds in Chimecho, which is just happy.
Rhoda is shocked.... Jesse isn't actually a Coordinator!?!
Get your priorities straight, woman!
Brock is furious that Jesse lied to Rhoda after she gave them food for free! Rhonda is also furious, you don't lie to her sister! Team Rocket don't care though, leaping out the window and into their Happy Buddha Face Meowth Balloon to take off. Pikachu tries to blast out of the cage but it is electricity proof, and the balloon actually has some oomph today as it gets clear of a Flamespin and Water Gun attack too.
But as they're flying free, Rhonda calls out to Mr. Mime to use Trick to trade the ladle in its hands with the key to the cage that Jesse is twirling on her finger. Jesse smacks herself in the face with the ladle and looks about in shock trying to figure out what happened, while Mr. Mime uses Psychic to use the key to unlock the cage. Team Rocket leap after the escaping Pokémon but psychic shoves Jesse over one end of the triple cage while Sneasel dodges James who ends up on the other end. Pikachu flips and uses its tail to knock Meowth into the central cage and lock it in, and then all three Pokémon jump over the edge, Sneasel making a point of slashing the balloon as it goes after a last look back over its shoulder at a furious Meowth.
Landing safely on the ground hundreds of feet below, Rhoda thanks Rhonda for her clear-headed thinking and tells her that she is leaving the restaurant to be run entirely by her, apologises to Sneasel and prepares for both of them to leave.... but Rhonda calls out that she hereby hires her as Restaurant Manager and Sneasel as Head Chef.
Well duh!
Back in the restaurant, Sneasel does the cooking with help from Mr. Mime which uses Psychic to prepare the food in a way that looks presentable. The twerps are delighted with the food, so much so that Ash's mouth actually EXPLODES a beam of light out of it and May is apparently living inside of Max's mouth now.
Well it does, just look at it!
And so with justice prevailing and the restaurant with the terrible location now running in unison, the twerps leave and head away utterly content..... never to know the terrible secret that forced the restaurant to move to the remote forest location in the first place. You see, as the twerps leave and the sisters wave goodbye, we see the name of the newly reunited restaurant.
Lesis'? As in "The Sisters' Restaurant"? Perhaps.... or perhaps..... LESBIAN SISTERS!
Brock you fool, you'll never know what you missed out on!
| BEST QUOTES |
 "Now here's the key to success folks; drive and determination!" "And it's been a long, long long, long long road getting here!" "Did he mention long?"
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