319: Zig Zag Zangoose!
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322: Zangusu versus Habuneku! Ribaru Taiketsu!
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Settling down to camp in a clearing by the lake, Nicholai tells how he recently challenged the leader of the Petalburg Gym (May and Max's Dad Norman) and when they learnt he knew May and Max they offered him to stay at their house for dinner.
They might not have been so keen if they'd learnt he was obsessed with their ten year old daughter's knickers.
The next day, Nicholai challenged their Father for a Pokemon Badge. Ash asks if he succeeded and Max laughs that his Dad is too strong to be beaten, but Nicholai chuckles that everyone figures that before meeting him..... so did he win?
Nope, he got creamed!
Ash is surprised he would admit defeat so readily, but Nicholai says there is no shame in getting beaten by May and Max's Father, especially since he wears Knickerbockers himself, leading to a shocking image in the minds of May and Max.
They insist their Dad would never battle in shorts, but Nicholai laughs that one day everyone will figure out they should wear them, and thumps May on the back as he does so. Brock figures that he is in training for a rematch and Nicholai agrees, so Ash asks if he feels like a Pokemon Battle to help them both out. Nicholai is happy to accept, and so he and Ash square off in a 2 on 2 battle.
Nicholai leaps into a Marshtomp outfit and calls out a Marshtomp, and May checks it with Dextina, figuring his Mudkip evolved. Ash counters this furry action with Treecko, which leaps aside from Water Gun and tries a Quick Attack, but is held off by constant Water Attacks. Ash yells at it not to stop but it is too late, it gets hit with Mudshot and knocked down, and Ash cries out for it to get up. Nicholai orders an Iron Tail to finish them off, but Treecko comes back with Bullet Seed and then Pound Attack to knock Marshtomp out, and now Nicholai is just left standing there in a stupid costume.
Watching all this from afar is Team Rocket, and Meowth figures they'll grab Pikachu while Ash is fighting him. James remembers Nicholai though, the weird kid who was obsessed with his own short pants!
"I don't care if he likes his short pants, long pants or underpants," hisses Jesse, "I just wanna get Pikachu!"
She calls out Seviper and instructs it to sneak up and grab Pikachu when Ash is looking the other way.
Meanwhile Nicholai compliments Ash for getting better but says he hasn't won yet, and brings out Zangoose (and his own costume) but when he orders Sword Dance, Zangoose stops, sniffs the air then leaps into the bushes and flushes out....
Nicholai remembers them and so do the twerps of course, and then Zangoose leaps out and faces off with Seviper, both glaring angrily at each other.
"What's the big idea of disobeying my orders?" Jesse demands of Seviper.
"What's the big idea of being here in the first place?" growls Ash.
"My big idea's prepare for trouble if you simply must know!"
"Make it double and get on with the show!" adds James.
"SEVIPER!" hisses Seviper, surprising them by cutting off the motto as Zangoose in turn rears up on its hind legs, ready to fight.
Nicholai explains that Seviper and Zangoose do not like each other (like snakes and mongoose in real life), Brock explaining to May that they can detect each others presence and can't resist the urge to fight.
They lunge at each other, then face off as Meowth shouts at Seviper that it is supposed to be grabbing Pikachu, calling it an overgrown Caterpie.... and it smacks Meowth with its tail and sends him careening with Jesse and James into the river. Seviper wraps around Zangoose and tries to squeeze the life out of it, but Zangoose hauls itself up and bites down on Seviper's coils, and Nicholai runs into them and they roll over him and into the river.
They continue fighting even as they're swept away by the current, Seviper getting the better of Zangoose and looming over it to finish the job, only for Ash's Corphish to Bubblebeam it aside and then swim in, grab Zangoose and pull it to safety.
They take it back to the camp for Brock to treat it, Nicholai petting it as it lies on a sheet and Brock gives Nicholai a soup of special herbs that - with rest - will help it get better. As it feeds, May and Max figure it must even now be wanting revenge on Seviper.
Team Rocket have washed up and James points out that Seviper is partly (well, entirely) to blame for all this, and then with a "BREEEEEE" Seviper launches out of the lake and lands directly in front of them, knocking them over in shock.
James leaps up and calls it a legless loser, blaming it for not following the plan, but when Seviper's fangs gleam and it stares him down, James moans that he's sorry and it was their plan that was the loser, then starts bowing down to it. Meowth says Seviper is trying to figure out if the Zangoose is still around because it wants to tear it to pieces.... and Jesse understands!
"I understand," she says, "I suppose everyone has one person in the world they wish they could abandon on an island or throw down a Raticate hole.... CASSIDY FOR INSTANCE!!!!!!"
As James and Meowth imagine a thought-bubble of Cassidy, Jesse becomes so infuriated that she tears through the fabric of reality, grabs their thoughts and tears them up into paper!
She tells Seviper she knows how it feels because she feels the same, so they're going to go find that Zangoose and tear it to pieces.
Meanwhile, Nicholai and the twerps check out Seviper with Dextina and find out that a battle could be pretty brutal, so Nicholai says he needs to get in some practise, and Ash offers to fill in for Seviper.... literally!
Okay that's just.... yeah ok.
So they start fighting... literally, they actually run in and start beat on each other, Ash slamming Nicholai in the face with his tail, then when Nicholai tries to dodge Ash bites him and...
What the fuck is this shit?
Nicholai says it seems that he's bound to lose but Ash tells him to keep trying, so they throw down again as Brock tells May and Max that this is actually not a bad idea, as the closer that Nicholai feels to Zangoose, the stronger their bond and the better they'll fight together.
It's still pretty freaky-deaky though.
Then they're interrupted by Skitty as it leaps out of its Pokeball and happily chases after Ash, the twerps in turn chasing after it but failing to capture the zig-zagging Pokemon. Jesse takes a chest-first leap at it (wherever she goes, her chest gets their first) but misses, and then.... they hear Seviper let out a, "BREEEE" in the distance and Zangoose staggers up from its sickbed and charges into the forest after it.
HEY TRAINERS WHICH OF THESE IS THE BEST CHOICE TO BATTLE NINJASK? TORKOAL, DEWGONG OR NOSEPASS? IF YOU CHOSE DEWGONG THEN HAHA HEY IT MAKES A SILLY NOISE WHEN IT SPEAKS.
Seviper stands ready to battle next to Jesse who calls out for Zangoose to come and fight, her voice projected by a microphone loudspeaker system run by James and Meowth. James is surprised she is wasting their time but Meowth notes it is a bigger waste of time to try and argue with her, and besides in the confusion of the fight maybe they can grab Pikachu?
Zangoose leaps out of the bushes and Seviper is delighted, but then Nicholai shows up and yells at it not to fight yet. Jesse says the fight is between Seviper and Zangoose only but Nicholai growls that he'll battle with Zangoose against her and Seviper. Jesse sends Seviper in and Zangoose dodges, apparently all it has the strength for is dodging... but if it can't attack how can it win? As Ash calls out encouragement, James and Meowth grab Pikachu with a mechanical arm and put it in an electric proof cage. James and Meowth tell Jesse to leave Seviper to fight with Zangoose while they run, and her reaction is... oh my.
She tells them to quit their babbling and take "their little Pikachu" out of there, but she is staying behind as Seviper's trainer to lead it to victory. They leg it, followed by a waddling and apparently very tired Wobbuffet, and the twerps try to chase but are slowed down by Zangoose dodging Seviper. Finally they clear it and take off, leaving behind just Jesse, Nicholai, Seviper and Zangoose, and the battle can really begin, Nicholai yelling at Jesse, "No skirt wearing girl will come close to beating us!"
James and Meowth run along panting roughly as Wobbuffet gets a second wind and starts passing them, and James calls out Cacnea to slow the twerps down, only for it to hug him happily before he convinces it to fire Pin Missile at them.
"Prepare fer trouble I've always wanted tah say!" grins Meowth.
"Huh?" asks James.
"Just do it like ya always do, ya gotta end in a rhyme!" giggles Meowth excitedly.
"I.... wha?" James replies, completely confused.
"OH COME ON, I'M JESSE!" he grins, then shouts out, "Prepare fer trouble here in da wood!"
"Make it double coz you know that you should!"
"Tah protect da world from devastation!"
"To unite all peoples within our nation!"
"Tah denounce da evils of truf and love!"
"To extend our reach to the stars above!"
"Meowth!"
"And James!"
"Team Rocket blast off at da speed of light!"
"Surrender now or prepare to fight, fight, fight!"
"WOBBUFFET!"
"DAT WAS AWESOME!" giggles Meowth, "From now on I'll fill in fer Jesse, okay?"
"I have to admit it went better than I thought," grins James, then notices Ash running and yelling towards them. James orders a Sandstorm attack which hauls Ash up and then over, crashing into Meowth and sending Pikachu flying through the air.
Back at the fight, Seviper tries to bite Zangoose and Nicholai tells it to keep dodging, then seems to get bitten and Seviper comes in with Poison Tail, but Nicholai yells at just the right point when to dodge. It seems that all the training with Ash has paid off but Zangoose is getting progressively more tired, and Jesse sends in Seviper to finish it... and then a caged Pikachu hurtles through the air and crashes into the ground between them before the twerps, James and Meowth all tackle each other in their effort to get at it. They struggle angrily trying to get at Pikachu, and when the dust clears....
Ash yells at Wobbuffet to give it back and they chase the laughing Wobbuffet around as it zigzags back and forth and Nicholai realises they can't catch it while it zigzags, then remembers earlier when the twerps couldn't get their hands back on Skitty because it was zig zagging.... so he yells at Zangoose to zig-zag while Jesse screams at everyone to STOP!
Ash grabs Pikachu's cage off of Wobbuffet's head as James and Meowth throw a wobbly, and Jesse snaps at them to take their silly squabble elsewhere, she has a battle to win. Nicholai sends in Zangoose and Jesse thinks she has it won now and sends Seviper in after it, but Zangoose zigzags about as Seviper continually chases then tries a Bite attack and Poison Tail... but Zangoose dodges and now Seviper is just as exhausted as Zangoose, and open to a crush claw that.... KNOCKS IT THE FUCK OUT!
The furry freak wins it!
Jesse drops to her knees and gasps that Seviper was amazing, and Meowth snaps enough with the mushy stuff, let's get Pikachu! James has Cacnea use Pin Missile and Ash orders a Thunderbolt that sends Team Rocket blasting off again, Jesse vowing revenge.
Nicholai congratulates Zangoose on an awesome battle and Ash says he did a good job too, and asks if he wants to finish their battle. Ash is ahead 1-0, and this time Nicholai swaps into the costume of - and calls out - a Zigzagoon. Ash sends in Pikachu, and the two run at each other and chase each other as May tells Max that if he keeps training like this he might get so good that everyone starts wearing silly blue shorts, even their Dad! They both giggle at the thought as the episode ends without a clear winner shown..... which suggests that Ash probably beat the shit out of Nicholai and they just didn't want to end on a sour note after all that "growing" the freak did as a person?
| BEST QUOTES |
 "I don't care if he likes short pants, long pants or underpants!""I suppose everyone has one person in the world they wish they could abandon on an island or throw down a Raticate hole.... CASSIDY FOR INSTANCE!!!!!
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